New Golf Rules......for the Average Golfer

[Bogey in The Woods]

ATTENTION

There have been some major rule changes in golf.

Finally! They are rules that actually make sense for us golfers.

Please advise all your friends of these important rule changes.

Rule 1.a.5

A ball sliced or hooked into the rough shall be lifted and placed on the fairway at a point equal to the distance it carried or rolled into the rough with no penalty.

The golfer should not be penalized for tall grass which ground keepers failed to mow.

Rule 2.d.6 (

A ball hitting a tree shall be deemed not to have hit the tree. This is simply bad luck and luck has no place in a scientific game.

The player must estimate the distance the ball would have travelled if it had not hit the tree and play the ball from there.

Rule 3.B.3 (G)

There shall be no such thing as a lost ball. The missing ball is on or near the course and will eventually be found and pocketed by someone else, making it a stolen ball.

The player is not to compound the felony by charging himself or herself with a penalty.

Rule 4.c.7 (h)

If a putt passes over a hole without dropping, it is deemed to have dropped. The Law of Gravity supersedes the Rules of Golf.

Rule 5

Putts that stop close enough to the cup that they could be blown in, may be blown in. This does not apply to balls more than three inches from the hole.

No one wants to make a travesty of the game.

Rule 6.a.9 (k)

There is no penalty for so-called “out of bounds”. If penny-pinching golf course owners bought sufficient land, this would not occur. The golfer deserves an apology, not a penalty.

Rule 7.G.15 (z)

There is no penalty for a ball in a water hazard, as golf balls should float. Golfers should not be penalized for manufacturers' shortcomings.

Rule 8.k.9 (S)

Advertisements claim that golf scores can be improved by purchasing new golf equipment. Since this is financially impractical for many golfers, one-half stroke per hole may be subtracted for using old equipment.

 

Please insure these new rules are added to your current rulebook. 

 

[Mr_Theoo]

Lol this is hilarious!

[jaxbeachpackerfan]

Bogey, you still at work? Doesn't appear you're getting much work done!  

Still, great post!

[Bogey in The Woods]

Bogey, you still at work? Doesn't appear you're getting much work done!  

Still, great post!

 

I beg your pardon sir! it was hard "work" doing all that research for you guys! 

[revkev]

Seems reasonable to me but I'd suggest one amendment. For the moving to fairway rule shouldn't the goalie be able to advance and pale the ball? After all had the grass been properly mown there would have had significantly more run out.

[BIG STU]

Good Post actually I have already seen some folks playing those rules.

[revkev]

Back to the ball in the rough, I'm going for another new rule, as Big Stu alluded to in his comment above I sense that it's already being applied.

 

3-c. Should the rough not be mown and a player's ball whether or not he is able to identify it,be deemed to have rolled out of bounds or into a hazard on account of it: The player shall drop at a point of his choosing so long as it leaves an unobstructed shot. The drop may be either closer to or no closer to the hole and must be made when the player's fellow competitors are not looking.

[BIG STU]

LOL Shocking that last paragraph from a "Man of the Cloth" no less!

[revkev]

LOL Shocking that last paragraph from a "Man of the Cloth" no less!

Hey I'm trying to have the rules reflect what actually happens on the course. There was a guy whom I used to play lots of golf with. I was a much better player but he would never let me give him more than 2 a side. After a while I realized that it really didn't matter because he would more than make up the difference by using his own special rule book. The guy never lost a ball or failed to have a clean lie with an opening to the pin, never. I guess trees really are 90 percent air.

[Bogey in The Woods]

I guess trees really are 90 percent air.

Then that 10 % is continuously kicking my ass!

[BIG STU]

Hey I'm trying to have the rules reflect what actually happens on the course. There was a guy whom I used to play lots of golf with. I was a much better player but he would never let me give him more than 2 a side. After a while I realized that it really didn't matter because he would more than make up the difference by using his own special rule book. The guy never lost a ball or failed to have a clean lie with an opening to the pin, never. I guess trees really are 90 percent air.

I know what you are saying in the rules bending department. the old gang from the golf shop used to cheat like crap moving the ball grounding the club in a bunker etc. I would play the ball down and still beat them. they used to like to play "wolf" for .25 a point. I can remember I used to come home with a Crown Royal bag full of quarters on Sunday afternoons. One guy who could not play a lick and was a fragrant abuser of the rules I gave him a rule book for Christmas one year. Now one of the guys was a stickler for the rules like me and practiced it. We ran a sham on those guys one day. Me and him would automatically pair up on those guys playing wolf. We cleaned them out one day and they never would play us again

[sp0rtsfan86]

Love this and the golfer whose backswing may hit a tree if he was carrying a 60 inch driver but kicks it out so his backswing is uninterupted. And then proceeds to hit a tree branch he never should have been near.