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Whats your best joke?


DarthGolfer

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A: I've got a great knock-knock joke, but you have to start it.

 

B: ok, Knock Knock!

 

A: Who's there?

 

B: ...

 

A: ...

WITB: 

Adams 9064LS 9.5* (until I cracked the face)

Adams Super LS 17*

Adams XTD Ti 23*

Wilson Staff Ci7 4-PW

Adams wedges: 52/7 56/13 60/7

Wilson Staff Infinite Southside putter/Odyssey DualForce 660 putter

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A: have you heard about Cole's Law?

 

B: no- what's that?

 

A: cabbage salad.

WITB: 

Adams 9064LS 9.5* (until I cracked the face)

Adams Super LS 17*

Adams XTD Ti 23*

Wilson Staff Ci7 4-PW

Adams wedges: 52/7 56/13 60/7

Wilson Staff Infinite Southside putter/Odyssey DualForce 660 putter

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My buddy Tom was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business.

 

He knew that he would inherit a fortune once his sickly father died.

 

Tom wanted two things:

 

• to learn how to invest his inheritance and,

 

• to find a wife to share his fortune.

 

One evening at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away.

 

 

 

 

 

"I may look like just an ordinary man," he said to her, "but in just a few years, my father will die, and I'll inherit 20 million dollars."

 

Impressed, the woman obtained his business card.

 

Two weeks later, she became his stepmother.

 

 

 

Women are so much better at estate planning than men…​

 

 

 

 

 

--

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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I just discovered my age group!

 

I am a Seenager. (Senior teenager)

 

I have everything that I wanted as a teenager, only 50-60 years later.

 

I don't have to go to school or work

 

I get an allowance every month.

 

I have my own pad.

 

I don't have a curfew.

 

I have a driver's license and my own car.

 

I have ID that gets me into bars and the wine store. I like the wine store best.

 

The people I hang around with are not scared of getting pregnant, they aren't scared of anything, they have been blessed to live this long, why be scared?

 

And I don't have acne.

 

Life is Good! Also, you will feel much more intelligent after reading this, if you are a Seenager.

 

Brains of older people are slow because they know so much.

 

People do not decline mentally with age, it just takes them longer to recall facts because they have more information in their brains.

 

Scientists believe this also makes you hard of hearing as it puts pressure on your inner ear.

 

Also, older people often go to another room to get something and when they get there, they stand there wondering what they came for.

 

It is NOT a memory problem, it is nature's way of making older people do more exercise.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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Haha- that's why kids don't listen so good- too much s#!t in their heads puts pressure on their eardrums!

WITB: 

Adams 9064LS 9.5* (until I cracked the face)

Adams Super LS 17*

Adams XTD Ti 23*

Wilson Staff Ci7 4-PW

Adams wedges: 52/7 56/13 60/7

Wilson Staff Infinite Southside putter/Odyssey DualForce 660 putter

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Share on other sites

 

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband..  
She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who  responded: 
" Rome?  Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty.  
You're crazy to go to Rome.  So, how are you getting there?"
 
"We're taking Continental," was the reply.  "We got a great rate!"
 
"Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser.  "That's a terrible airline.  Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late.  So, where are you staying in Rome?"
 
"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."
 
"Don't go any further.  I know that place.  Everybody thinks it's going to be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."
 
"We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."
 
"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser.  "You and a million other people trying to see him.  He'll look the size of an ant.  Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours.  You're going to need it."
 
A month later, the woman again came in for a hairdo.  The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome. 
 
"It was wonderful," explained the woman, "not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes,  but it was overbooked, 
and they bumped us up to first class.  The food and wine were wonderful,  and I had a handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot..   
And the hotel was great!  They'd just finished a $5 million remodeling job, 
and now it's a  jewel,  the finest hotel in the city.  
They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge!"
 
"Well," muttered the hairdresser,  "that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the  Pope."  
 
"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me.  Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand!  I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me.."
 
"Oh, really!  What'd he say?" 
 
He said: "Who screwed up your hair?"

Driver -     Rogue ST Max
Woods -   Rogue ST Max  3, 5 & 7 Woods
Irons  -      Rogue ST Max                                                                                                                                                                                          Wedges -   Zipcore RTX 6 50°  CBX2   54* & 58*                                                                                                                                                          Putter -    Evnroll ER2
Rangefinder -  NX-10 Slope
Ball -  Vice Pro Tour Drip                                                                                                                                                                                            Bag -  Xtreme Cart 7.0 Bag Heather/Red/White

 

 

 

 

 

 

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A Sailor walks into a restroom and stands next to a Marine.

The Marine finishes and heads to the door.

The Sailor yells out, "Hey! In the Navy, they teach us to wash our hands."

The Marine says, "Well, in the Marines, they teach us not to pee on them."

 

Sent from my SM-G920V using MyGolfSpy mobile app

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So, perhaps a few weeks late, but still a good joke (and, BTW, this one is from my wife!!!)
 
A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring. He replies: “I have a question to ask, but I don't want to offend you.”

She answers, “My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.”

“Well, I've always had a fantasy - to have a nun kiss me.”

She responds, “Well, let's see what we can do about that… 1) You have to be single and 2) You must be Catholic.”

The cab driver is very excited and says, “Yes, I'm single and Catholic!”

“OK” the nun says. “Pull into the next alley.” The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

“My dear child,” said the nun, “why are you crying?” “Forgive me, but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish.”

The nun says, “That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party!”

What's in the bag?
 
Driver :callaway-small: Callaway Mavrik 105 set to 9.5, square, Aldila Rogue White 130 MSI 60G Stiff shaft
#3 Wood  :callaway-small: Callaway FT Tour 13 degree neutral setup, Fuijkara 370 Stiff Shaft
Hybrid  :cobra-small:  18 Degree King Cobra Baffler pro, Baffler Stiff shaft
4-PW :titelist-small: Titlest 714 AP2, Standard loft and lie, MGS S Shafts
:benhogan-small: 53, 57 degree loft Hogan Equalizer wedges
1962  :wilson_staff_small: Wilson "Sandy Andy" sand wedge with HUGE bounce!
Putter MLA Pro Classic
:titelist-small: Titlist ProV 1, ProV 1x

Currently Gaming "Costco Kirkland Signature Tour Performance" balls

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What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts????

 

 

 

 

Beer Nuts are $ 1.50.......

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Deer Nuts are under a buck............

 

 

 

 

Groans may now commence.........

What's in the bag?
 
Driver :callaway-small: Callaway Mavrik 105 set to 9.5, square, Aldila Rogue White 130 MSI 60G Stiff shaft
#3 Wood  :callaway-small: Callaway FT Tour 13 degree neutral setup, Fuijkara 370 Stiff Shaft
Hybrid  :cobra-small:  18 Degree King Cobra Baffler pro, Baffler Stiff shaft
4-PW :titelist-small: Titlest 714 AP2, Standard loft and lie, MGS S Shafts
:benhogan-small: 53, 57 degree loft Hogan Equalizer wedges
1962  :wilson_staff_small: Wilson "Sandy Andy" sand wedge with HUGE bounce!
Putter MLA Pro Classic
:titelist-small: Titlist ProV 1, ProV 1x

Currently Gaming "Costco Kirkland Signature Tour Performance" balls

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CRUISE SHIP DIARY...

 

 

DEAR DIARY - DAY 1

 

All packed for the cruise ship -- all my nicest dresses, swimsuits, shortsets.. Really, really exciting. Our local Ladies Bowls Club – ‘The Late Bloomers' decided on this "all-girls" trip. It will be my first one - and I can't wait!

 

--------------------------------------------------

 

DEAR DIARY - DAY 2

 

Entire day at sea, so beautiful. Saw whales and dolphins. Met the Captain today -- seems like a very nice man.

 

------------------------------ -----------

 

DEAR DIARY - DAY 3

 

At the pool today. Did some shuffleboard, hit golf balls off the deck. The Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner.. Felt honored and had a wonderful time. He is very attractive and attentive...

------------------------------ -----------

 

DEAR DIARY - DAY 4

 

Won $2,000 in the ship's Casino. The Captain asked me to have dinner with him in his own cabin. Had a scrumptious meal complete with caviar and champagne. He asked me to stay the night, but I declined. Told him I could not be unfaithful to my husband.

------------------------------ -----------

 

DEAR DIARY - DAY 5

 

Pool again today. Got really sunburned, and I went inside for a drink at the piano-bar and to cool down; stayed there for rest of day. The Captain saw me, bought me several large drinks. Really is quite charming Again asked me to visit his cabin for the night.

Again, I declined. He told me, if I did not let him have his way with me, he would sink the ship... I was shocked.

 

---------------------------------------------------------

 

DEAR DIARY - DAY 6

 

Today I saved 2600 lives. Twice ..........

 

 

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death. Their biggest fear was that there was no afterlife at all.

 
After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word, he made the first contact.
 
“Marion, Marion?”
"Is that you, Bob?”
“Yes, I've come back like we agreed."
“That's wonderful!  What's it like?”
"Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex.  I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times.  Then I have lunch (you'd be proud -- lots of greens).  Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to the golf course. Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again.”
 "Oh, Bob!  Are you in Heaven?"
 â€œNo, … I came back as a rabbit.  I'm somewhere in Arizona."

We don’t stop playing the game because we get old; we get old because we stop playing the game.”

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An elderly couple learned to send text messages on their mobile phones.

 

The wife, a retired college English instructor with emphasis on the

Classics, was an unapologetic romantic; her husband, a retired salty

Navy chief petty officer of thirty years' service, was a no-nonsense

guy.

 

One afternoon the wife went to the local Starbuck's to meet a friend

for coffee. While awaiting her friend's arrival, she exercised her

new skill by sending her husband a romantic text message: "If you are

sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your

smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send

me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you."

 

The husband responded: "I'm takin' a sh*t. Please advise."

 

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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  • 2 weeks later...

A successful rancher near San Antonio, Texas died and left everything to his devoted wife.

 

 

 

She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house rather than the drunk.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing well.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels. " The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night. One o'clock came, however,

and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired hand.

 

 

 

 

Finally he returned at two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him..........

 

 

 

 

 

She quietly called him over to her.. "Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said. Trembling, he did as she directed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Now take off my boots." He did as she asked, ever so slowly. "Now take off my socks." He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots. "Now take off my skirt." He slowly unbuttoned it, instantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Now take off my bra." Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then she looked at him and said, " If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired ."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(P.S. - I didn't see it coming, either)

 

 

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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WITB of an "aspiring"  😉 play-ah ...
Driver...Callaway Paradym (Aldila Ascent PL Blue 40/A)
5W...Callaway Great Big Bertha (MCA Kai'Li Red 50/R)
7W...Tour Edge Exotics EXS (Tensei CK Blue 50/R)

4H...Callaway Epic Super Hybrid (Recoil ZT9 F3)
5H...Callaway Big Bertha ('19) (Recoil 460 ESX F3)
6i-GW...Sub 70 699 V2 (Recoil 660 F3) 
54°, 60°...Cleveland CBX2, CBX 60 (Rotex graphite)
Putter...Ev
nRoll ER5 or MLA Tour XDream (P2 Reflex grip on both)
...all in a Datrek bag on an MGI Zip Navigator electric cart. Ball often, not always, MaxFli Tour.

Forum Member tester for the Paradym X driver (2023)
Forum Member tester for the ExPutt Putting Simulator (2020)

followthrough.jpg

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A WISH TO LIVE FOREVER

 

 

 

 

I met a fairy who said she would grant me one wish.

 

Immediately I said, "I want to live forever."

 

"Sorry," said the fairy, "I'm not allowed to grant eternal life."

 

"OK," I said, "Then, I want to die after Congress gets its head out of its a*s!"

 

The fairy replied, "You crafty bastard."

 

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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For all you other aging and beer-loving dudes.........

IMG_20171217_174946042_BURST000_COVER.jpg

WITB of an "aspiring"  😉 play-ah ...
Driver...Callaway Paradym (Aldila Ascent PL Blue 40/A)
5W...Callaway Great Big Bertha (MCA Kai'Li Red 50/R)
7W...Tour Edge Exotics EXS (Tensei CK Blue 50/R)

4H...Callaway Epic Super Hybrid (Recoil ZT9 F3)
5H...Callaway Big Bertha ('19) (Recoil 460 ESX F3)
6i-GW...Sub 70 699 V2 (Recoil 660 F3) 
54°, 60°...Cleveland CBX2, CBX 60 (Rotex graphite)
Putter...Ev
nRoll ER5 or MLA Tour XDream (P2 Reflex grip on both)
...all in a Datrek bag on an MGI Zip Navigator electric cart. Ball often, not always, MaxFli Tour.

Forum Member tester for the Paradym X driver (2023)
Forum Member tester for the ExPutt Putting Simulator (2020)

followthrough.jpg

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Did you get the shirt? Might be too late to add it to my Christmas list.

Yep! A gift from some old friends and their kids :-)

 

(They know me very well!)

WITB of an "aspiring"  😉 play-ah ...
Driver...Callaway Paradym (Aldila Ascent PL Blue 40/A)
5W...Callaway Great Big Bertha (MCA Kai'Li Red 50/R)
7W...Tour Edge Exotics EXS (Tensei CK Blue 50/R)

4H...Callaway Epic Super Hybrid (Recoil ZT9 F3)
5H...Callaway Big Bertha ('19) (Recoil 460 ESX F3)
6i-GW...Sub 70 699 V2 (Recoil 660 F3) 
54°, 60°...Cleveland CBX2, CBX 60 (Rotex graphite)
Putter...Ev
nRoll ER5 or MLA Tour XDream (P2 Reflex grip on both)
...all in a Datrek bag on an MGI Zip Navigator electric cart. Ball often, not always, MaxFli Tour.

Forum Member tester for the Paradym X driver (2023)
Forum Member tester for the ExPutt Putting Simulator (2020)

followthrough.jpg

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Not sure if this belongs in the joke thread or Christmas present thread - you can decide

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YvT_gqs5ETk

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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Not sure if this belongs in the joke thread or Christmas present thread - you can decide B)

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YvT_gqs5ETk

Hilarious!!! Good find!

WITB of an "aspiring"  😉 play-ah ...
Driver...Callaway Paradym (Aldila Ascent PL Blue 40/A)
5W...Callaway Great Big Bertha (MCA Kai'Li Red 50/R)
7W...Tour Edge Exotics EXS (Tensei CK Blue 50/R)

4H...Callaway Epic Super Hybrid (Recoil ZT9 F3)
5H...Callaway Big Bertha ('19) (Recoil 460 ESX F3)
6i-GW...Sub 70 699 V2 (Recoil 660 F3) 
54°, 60°...Cleveland CBX2, CBX 60 (Rotex graphite)
Putter...Ev
nRoll ER5 or MLA Tour XDream (P2 Reflex grip on both)
...all in a Datrek bag on an MGI Zip Navigator electric cart. Ball often, not always, MaxFli Tour.

Forum Member tester for the Paradym X driver (2023)
Forum Member tester for the ExPutt Putting Simulator (2020)

followthrough.jpg

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Skeleton walks up to a bar, orders a beer and a mop...

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

Right Handed

4.5 handicap

Driver: Nike Vapor Flex with Mitsubishi Rayon Fubuki ZT60x5ct S-flex shaft and stock grip.

3-Metal: Nike VRS 15 degree with Mitsubishi Rayon tour issue Diamana S73x5ct X-flex shaft and GolfPride MCC midsize Black/White grip.

Irons: Ben Hogan PTx 22, 26, 30, 34, 38, 42, 46 degrees standard length and lie with KBS Tour-V stiff shafts and GolfPride MCC midsize Black/White grips.

Wedges: Ben Hogan TK15 54, 58 degrees with KBS Tour-V X-flex shafts and GolfPride MCC midsize Black/White grips.

Putter: Nike Method Converge B1|01 with Superstroke Flatso 2.0 grip.

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There was a senior group that walked the mall before the stores opened.  A couple of ladies noticed an old gentleman sitting in the middle of the mall and his genitals were exposed.  One lady said to the other, I wonder if that old coot knows he is exposed.  They agreed to tell him when they returned to his location.  At such time, they said to him, sir, did you know that your genitals are exposed.  He replied:  yes, I know, it died yesterday and today is the viewing.

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  • SPY VIP

Went to a zoo the other day and the only animal they had was one dog.

 

 

It was a Shih Tzu 

 

B)

Volvo Intorqueo

All the cool kids follow me on twitter: @GolfspyDave

If you are not a cool kid, following me on twitter will make you cool...

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Went to a zoo the other day and the only animal they had was one dog.

 

 

It was a Shih Tzu

 

B)

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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  • 2 weeks later...

OK, it's New Year's Day and here's a new one to start off the year.

 

 

Toward the end of the Sunday service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?"

 

80% held up their hands.

 

The Minister then repeated his question. All responded this time, except one man, an avid golfer named Walter Barnes, who attended church only when the weather was bad.

            

"Mr. Barnes, it's obviously not a good morning for golf.  It's good to see you here today. Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?"

 

"I don't have any," he replied gruffly.

 

"Mr. Barnes, that is very unusual. How old are you?"

 

"Ninety-eight," he replied. The congregation stood up and clapped their hands.

 

"Oh, Mr. Barnes, would you please come down in front and tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years and not have an enemy in the world?"

 

The old golfer tottered down the aisle, stopped in front of the pulpit, turned around, faced the congregation, and said simply,  "I outlived all the Sons of @#s."

We don’t stop playing the game because we get old; we get old because we stop playing the game.”

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Stress!

 

 

You pick up a hitchhiker...

A young, sexy, beautiful girl.

Suddenly, she faints inside your truck and

you take her to the hospital.

 

Now that's stressful.

 

 

 

But at the hospital, they say she is pregnant and

congratulate you that you're going to be a father.

You say that you are not the father, but the girl says you are.

This is getting very stressful!

 

 

You request a DNA test to prove that you are not the father.

 

 

After the tests are completed,

The doctor says the test shows you're infertile,

And probably have been since birth.

You're extremely stressed but relieved.

 

 

 

On your way back home, you think about your 5 kids at home...

 

 

Now that's stress!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

Left Hand orientation

:taylormade-small:SIM 2 D Max with Fujikura Air Speeder Shaft 

Cobra  Radspeed 3W/RIptide Shaft
:ping-small:  410  Hybrids 22*, 26*

Cobra Speed Zone 6-GP/Recoil ESX 460 F3 Shafts 

:titelist-small: SM7 54* Wedge

:ping-small: Glide 3.0  60* Wedge

:odyssey-small: O Works putter

:ShotScope: V3
:918457628_PrecisionPro:NX9-HD

:CaddyTek: - 4 Wheel 

EZGO TXT 48v cart
:footjoy-small: - too many shoes to list and so many to buy

:1590477705_SunMountain: And  BAG Boy

Golf Balls: Vice Pro Plus 

2020 Official Teste:SuperSpeed: Beginning Driver Speed  - 78

2019 Official Tester :ping-small:  410 Driver

2018 Official Tester :wilson-small: C300

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