Jump to content

Whats your best joke?


DarthGolfer

Recommended Posts

A married couple in their early 60’s were celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny, beautiful fairy appeared on their table saying, “For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other all this time, I will grant you each a wish.” The wife said, “Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband.” The fairy waved her wand and two tickets for a luxury cruise liner suddenly appeared on the table.

Now it was the husband’s turn. He said, “Well, this is all very romantic but an opportunity like this will never come again. Sorry, my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me.”

The wife and the fairy were deeply disappointed in his choice but a wish is a wish. So the fairy waved her wand and - poof! - the husband became 92 years old.

The moral of this story . . . be careful what you wish for.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 3

Driver -  :callaway-small:  Mavrik with Reg. Flex UST Mamiya Helium Black 4 Graphite Shaft
Woods - :callaway-small:   Mavrik 3 Wood & Epic Flash  Heavenwood
Hybrid - :callaway-small:   Epic Flash 4H
Irons - :callaway-small:   Rogue X 5 - AW
Wedges -  :cleveland-small:  CBX2 54* & 58*
Putter -   :EVNROLL: ER2
Rangefinder - Bushnell Pro XE
Ball -  :taylormade-small: TP5-X  PIC

Bag -  2020 Bag Boy Chiller Cart Bag

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

IMG_1242.PNG


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

  • Like 3
  • Haha 6

Rick

 

 

Left Hand, 

Driver; Titleist TSi2, Kuro Kage 50 gr R2

5 Wood; Cally Steelhead 

5 Hybrid; Cally Steelhead, Hazardous Vista Pro R2

Irons; Ping G710 6-GW, Recoil 460 R2

Putter; Waaay too many to list

Link to comment
Share on other sites

^^^ that is AWESOME!!! ^^^

  • Like 1

WITB of an "aspiring"  😉 play-ah ...
..Callaway Epic Speed 4W and Epic Max 7W (both Project X Cypher)
..Callaway Big Bertha 4H and 5H (both Recoil ZTR)
..PXG 0211 6i-GW (Mitsubishi MMT) 
..Cleveland CBX-2 54 and CBX 60 (both Rotex graphite)
...Edel EAS 4.0 (stock shaft, zero offset hosel, round grip)
..all in a Datrek bag on an MGI Zip Navigator electric cart.

Forum Member tester for the ExPutt Putting Simulator (2020)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/18/2020 at 6:14 PM, Rickp said:

IMG_1242.PNG


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

Grammar matters!

  • Like 3

In my :cobra-small: Ultralight Stand Bag:

Driver:    :callaway-small: Rogue 10.5° - LH -  Project X EvenFlow 60 Stiff
Woods:   :cobra-small: King F9 - LH - 3/4 Wood - Atmos Blue TS 7 Stiff
               :cobra-small: King F9 - LH - 5/6 Wood - Atmos Blue TS 7 Stiff
Irons:      :cobra-small: King F9 - LH - 5-GW - KBS C-Taper Lite Stiff
Wedges: :cobra-small: King Black - LH - 52° 56° 60° - KBS Hi-Rev 2.0 Stiff
Putter:     :1332069271_TommyArmour: - Impact No. 3
Ball:        :taylormade-small: TP5x

Rangefinder: :skycaddie: LX5 Watch

Link to comment
Share on other sites

IMG_1293.GIF


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

  • Haha 5

Rick

 

 

Left Hand, 

Driver; Titleist TSi2, Kuro Kage 50 gr R2

5 Wood; Cally Steelhead 

5 Hybrid; Cally Steelhead, Hazardous Vista Pro R2

Irons; Ping G710 6-GW, Recoil 460 R2

Putter; Waaay too many to list

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...

ForgotGoat.jpg

  • Like 3
  • Haha 3

Callaway  Epic Flash 10.5 Driver
Callaway MAVRIK  3 hybrid 18 Degree
Callaway Big Bertha 2019  4 hybrid 
Callaway  Max 5 - PW Irons
Cleveland CBX 2 50 & 54 Degree Wedge
Cleveland CBX Full-Face Wedge 58 degree
Odyssey
White Hot OG 7 S

 

 



 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I heard a man criticizing the way the Lord made things.

He said, “It doesn’t make sense to me. A great big oak tree only has little acorns on it, but a weak watermelon vine has to bear those heavy watermelons.

It would make sense for the watermelons to be on the oak tree, and the acorns on the vine.”

About that time an acorn hit him on the head, and he said, “I’m glad it wasn’t a watermelon.”

  • Like 2
  • Haha 5

Driver -  :callaway-small:  Mavrik with Reg. Flex UST Mamiya Helium Black 4 Graphite Shaft
Woods - :callaway-small:   Mavrik 3 Wood & Epic Flash  Heavenwood
Hybrid - :callaway-small:   Epic Flash 4H
Irons - :callaway-small:   Rogue X 5 - AW
Wedges -  :cleveland-small:  CBX2 54* & 58*
Putter -   :EVNROLL: ER2
Rangefinder - Bushnell Pro XE
Ball -  :taylormade-small: TP5-X  PIC

Bag -  2020 Bag Boy Chiller Cart Bag

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

What is the Italian word for enema?....innuendo 

  • Like 1
  • Haha 6

Check out my reviews:

 :ping-small: G710 Irons Official Review

:Fuji: MC Shaft & :EVNROLL: V Series Putter Official Review

WITB:

:ping-small:  Traverse is filled with all this shiny metal and tracked by :Arccos::

:cobra-small: RadSpeed 8* - MotoreX F1 6X I :taylormade-small: SIM 3W - Project X HZRDUS Green 

:taylormade-small: 2019 P790 4-PW - Project X 6.5 LZ I :titelist-small: 48 (SM8), 52, 56, 60 (SM7) - Nippon Modus 125 S 

:EVNROLL: ER2VI :titelist-small: PROV1X #19 

🇺🇸Thank you to all those that have served/are serving and God Bless America 🇺🇸

Link to comment
Share on other sites

IMG_1367.JPG


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

  • Like 5
  • Haha 1

Rick

 

 

Left Hand, 

Driver; Titleist TSi2, Kuro Kage 50 gr R2

5 Wood; Cally Steelhead 

5 Hybrid; Cally Steelhead, Hazardous Vista Pro R2

Irons; Ping G710 6-GW, Recoil 460 R2

Putter; Waaay too many to list

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 8/28/2020 at 6:13 PM, Rickp said:

IMG_1367.JPG


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

i am stealing this one!

  • Like 2

Driver : :taylormade-small: SIM2 Max 9* MC Kuro Kago Silver 60 Stiff

Woods : :benhogan-small: GS53 3 Wood 14* Mitsubish Tensei Blue 73g Regular

Hybrids: :callaway-small: XR Project X Stiff (3&4)

Irons : sub70logo.png.3c207e4e90c1eeca7b9a917b5fa4b848.png 699 Pro Black 5-AW 1* flat KBS Tour V 90 Stiff Shafts 

Wedges : File:Kirkland Signature logo.svg - Wikimedia Commons 52, 56, 60 

Putter : :taylormade-small:Spider Red

Bag : datrek-brand_1456761019__86876.original.jpg.7c24f9ae71c7730ce29a828226731487.jpg lightweight cart bag | motocaddy.jpg.258c0b46e60c2804fc6b1f64bca0aef3.jpgDry Series Bag

Ball :  :taylormade-small: TP5 PIX (2019) | Screen-Shot-2017-07-20-at-7_24.05-AM-300x118.png.9f1c4cb1d62511ee40a05bd6d5795f97.png ProV1x (2021)

Rangefinder : 836d5c8b9e44880db86abcd3b735255d.w2480_h836.jpg.bcd4050c642957abbdca7453a6cb0469.jpg ULT-X

Pushcart : motocaddy.jpg.258c0b46e60c2804fc6b1f64bca0aef3.jpgM5 GPS DHC Electric Push Cart

SoCal, USA

Right handed HDCP 16.4

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This one might already have been posted but:

Jesus and Moses are playing a round and get to a watery par 3 with about 170 from tee to green.
Moses plays his 6 iron and hits a beautiful shot to the middle of the green.
Jesus grabs his 7i and tees up.
Moses says "Jesus, I think you should play the 6I."
Jesus replies " I know what I am doing. If I Tiger can do it so can I"
Jesus proceeds to hit a beautiful 7i shot which comes up short of the green and dunks into the water.
Moses says "I told you so" to which Jesus replied "I know what I am doing. if Tiger can do it so can I" 
Jesus tees up another and hits another beautiful 7I shot straight into the water short of the green. After hitting about 6 more balls, Jesus decides he will drop and proceeds to walk on the water to pick up his balls.
At that moment, a twosome arrives behind them on the tee and sees Jesus walking on the water. They exclaim "Wow look at that guy. Who does he think he is? Jesus Christ?"
To which Moses replies "No he thinks he's Tiger Woods!"

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1

Driver : :taylormade-small: SIM2 Max 9* MC Kuro Kago Silver 60 Stiff

Woods : :benhogan-small: GS53 3 Wood 14* Mitsubish Tensei Blue 73g Regular

Hybrids: :callaway-small: XR Project X Stiff (3&4)

Irons : sub70logo.png.3c207e4e90c1eeca7b9a917b5fa4b848.png 699 Pro Black 5-AW 1* flat KBS Tour V 90 Stiff Shafts 

Wedges : File:Kirkland Signature logo.svg - Wikimedia Commons 52, 56, 60 

Putter : :taylormade-small:Spider Red

Bag : datrek-brand_1456761019__86876.original.jpg.7c24f9ae71c7730ce29a828226731487.jpg lightweight cart bag | motocaddy.jpg.258c0b46e60c2804fc6b1f64bca0aef3.jpgDry Series Bag

Ball :  :taylormade-small: TP5 PIX (2019) | Screen-Shot-2017-07-20-at-7_24.05-AM-300x118.png.9f1c4cb1d62511ee40a05bd6d5795f97.png ProV1x (2021)

Rangefinder : 836d5c8b9e44880db86abcd3b735255d.w2480_h836.jpg.bcd4050c642957abbdca7453a6cb0469.jpg ULT-X

Pushcart : motocaddy.jpg.258c0b46e60c2804fc6b1f64bca0aef3.jpgM5 GPS DHC Electric Push Cart

SoCal, USA

Right handed HDCP 16.4

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i am stealing this one!

Not a problem, I stole it also!


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy
  • Like 2

Rick

 

 

Left Hand, 

Driver; Titleist TSi2, Kuro Kage 50 gr R2

5 Wood; Cally Steelhead 

5 Hybrid; Cally Steelhead, Hazardous Vista Pro R2

Irons; Ping G710 6-GW, Recoil 460 R2

Putter; Waaay too many to list

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

119055485_1355086301502619_3070134386287

  • Like 1
  • Haha 2

Driver -  :callaway-small:  Mavrik with Reg. Flex UST Mamiya Helium Black 4 Graphite Shaft
Woods - :callaway-small:   Mavrik 3 Wood & Epic Flash  Heavenwood
Hybrid - :callaway-small:   Epic Flash 4H
Irons - :callaway-small:   Rogue X 5 - AW
Wedges -  :cleveland-small:  CBX2 54* & 58*
Putter -   :EVNROLL: ER2
Rangefinder - Bushnell Pro XE
Ball -  :taylormade-small: TP5-X  PIC

Bag -  2020 Bag Boy Chiller Cart Bag

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, DawgDaddy said:

119055485_1355086301502619_3070134386287

I am a native born and raised NYer who grew up on real pizza (not that pizza casserole you Chicagoans call deep dish lol) and I still don't get it~!

  • Like 2

Driver : :taylormade-small: SIM2 Max 9* MC Kuro Kago Silver 60 Stiff

Woods : :benhogan-small: GS53 3 Wood 14* Mitsubish Tensei Blue 73g Regular

Hybrids: :callaway-small: XR Project X Stiff (3&4)

Irons : sub70logo.png.3c207e4e90c1eeca7b9a917b5fa4b848.png 699 Pro Black 5-AW 1* flat KBS Tour V 90 Stiff Shafts 

Wedges : File:Kirkland Signature logo.svg - Wikimedia Commons 52, 56, 60 

Putter : :taylormade-small:Spider Red

Bag : datrek-brand_1456761019__86876.original.jpg.7c24f9ae71c7730ce29a828226731487.jpg lightweight cart bag | motocaddy.jpg.258c0b46e60c2804fc6b1f64bca0aef3.jpgDry Series Bag

Ball :  :taylormade-small: TP5 PIX (2019) | Screen-Shot-2017-07-20-at-7_24.05-AM-300x118.png.9f1c4cb1d62511ee40a05bd6d5795f97.png ProV1x (2021)

Rangefinder : 836d5c8b9e44880db86abcd3b735255d.w2480_h836.jpg.bcd4050c642957abbdca7453a6cb0469.jpg ULT-X

Pushcart : motocaddy.jpg.258c0b46e60c2804fc6b1f64bca0aef3.jpgM5 GPS DHC Electric Push Cart

SoCal, USA

Right handed HDCP 16.4

Link to comment
Share on other sites

36 minutes ago, golfish! said:

I am a native born and raised NYer who grew up on real pizza (not that pizza casserole you Chicagoans call deep dish lol) and I still don't get it~!

You mean, uh... the kind you fold and eat like a taco?   😁

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1

We don’t stop playing the game because we get old; we get old because we stop playing the game.”

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, Kenny B said:

You mean, uh... the kind you fold and eat like a taco?   😁

Yes exactly lol

  • Like 2

Driver : :taylormade-small: SIM2 Max 9* MC Kuro Kago Silver 60 Stiff

Woods : :benhogan-small: GS53 3 Wood 14* Mitsubish Tensei Blue 73g Regular

Hybrids: :callaway-small: XR Project X Stiff (3&4)

Irons : sub70logo.png.3c207e4e90c1eeca7b9a917b5fa4b848.png 699 Pro Black 5-AW 1* flat KBS Tour V 90 Stiff Shafts 

Wedges : File:Kirkland Signature logo.svg - Wikimedia Commons 52, 56, 60 

Putter : :taylormade-small:Spider Red

Bag : datrek-brand_1456761019__86876.original.jpg.7c24f9ae71c7730ce29a828226731487.jpg lightweight cart bag | motocaddy.jpg.258c0b46e60c2804fc6b1f64bca0aef3.jpgDry Series Bag

Ball :  :taylormade-small: TP5 PIX (2019) | Screen-Shot-2017-07-20-at-7_24.05-AM-300x118.png.9f1c4cb1d62511ee40a05bd6d5795f97.png ProV1x (2021)

Rangefinder : 836d5c8b9e44880db86abcd3b735255d.w2480_h836.jpg.bcd4050c642957abbdca7453a6cb0469.jpg ULT-X

Pushcart : motocaddy.jpg.258c0b46e60c2804fc6b1f64bca0aef3.jpgM5 GPS DHC Electric Push Cart

SoCal, USA

Right handed HDCP 16.4

Link to comment
Share on other sites

12 hours ago, golfish! said:

I am a native born and raised NYer who grew up on real pizza (not that pizza casserole you Chicagoans call deep dish lol) and I still don't get it~!

Not to over think the joke, but it's pretty easy to understand the circle, triangle, square bit. Simply the most efficient way to complete those pizza related tasks. The pizza becomes a circle because of the centrifugal force of tossing the dough, cut into triangle slices because it makes equal portions by just making straight lines across the diameter, and put into a square box because it's harder to make a box in any other shape!

....okay, I'm finished, sorry 😃 

  • Like 3

Driver: PXG 0211 9*(set at 7.5*) Tensei Pro White 60g
Woods: PXG 0211 16.5* Tensei Pro Blue 70g
Hybrid/Irons/Wedges: PXG 0211 SteelFiber 95g
Putter: PXG Blackjack / SeeMore Mini Giant Deep Flange 34”

Bag: Vessel Player III Stand Bag - White

“Golf is a good walk enhanced”

Link to comment
Share on other sites

IMG_1386.PNG


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

  • Like 3

Rick

 

 

Left Hand, 

Driver; Titleist TSi2, Kuro Kage 50 gr R2

5 Wood; Cally Steelhead 

5 Hybrid; Cally Steelhead, Hazardous Vista Pro R2

Irons; Ping G710 6-GW, Recoil 460 R2

Putter; Waaay too many to list

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not to over think the joke, but it's pretty easy to understand the circle, triangle, square bit. Simply the most efficient way to complete those pizza related tasks. The pizza becomes a circle because of the centrifugal force of tossing the dough, cut into triangle slices because it makes equal portions by just making straight lines across the diameter, and put into a square box because it's harder to make a box in any other shape!
....okay, I'm finished, sorry [emoji2] 

Suspect a bit of Engineering background.[emoji33]


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy
  • Like 3

Rick

 

 

Left Hand, 

Driver; Titleist TSi2, Kuro Kage 50 gr R2

5 Wood; Cally Steelhead 

5 Hybrid; Cally Steelhead, Hazardous Vista Pro R2

Irons; Ping G710 6-GW, Recoil 460 R2

Putter; Waaay too many to list

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...