5 Etiquete Pet Peeves

[Betty Rene]

Is there a woman in your life who doesn't like to or won't play golf with you? This may be the reason. (BTW, I have never seen these traits in any woman I play golf with).

#1.  When we are on the course, don't give me a golf lesson if I haven't asked for one. Nothing you tell me will ‘fix' anything. These men cannot seem to understand their statements are not helpful and they will continue with their “lesson” round after round. Many have seen the worst in me as I finally lose patience with their unwanted suggestions.  

#2.  If I have hit the ball incorrectly, don't tell me what I did wrong. I will know something will be amiss through my approach, during my swing, at impact, or during my follow-through. I know if it is hit thin, fat, sliced, pulled, or flat-out duffed. You don't criticize and tell your male partners what they have done wrong on every bad shot, yet with a woman golfer, you have to tell her everything she does wrong as if she doesn't already know.

#3. Don't tell me how to drive the cart. Chances are I drive better than you.

#4. Don't treat me like I'm an inferior golfer, that I don't have any understanding of the game, the logistics, or general knowledge of the game.

#5. Don't patronize me!

You may not have even realized that you fit into the category of male golfers which women golfers hate to play golf with. Now that these traits have been exposed, think of what you tell your wife, girlfriend, sister, any woman while she is golfing. Can you in retrospect see how your “helpful” comments are not only a detriment to a fun game but hurtful? Remember that if you are golfing with a woman, show the same respect to her as you would a male golfer. Keep your critiques, criticism, and golf lessons to yourself, and if you must discuss this, wait until the 19th hole.

 

[PlaidJacket]

I don't do any of that crap. The few ladies I get to play with on occasion don't need my help and I know it. There's one lady in particular that can beat most of the men I play with. Including me on any given day. She's a player and tees it up from the Men's middle tee. Love playing with her when I can.

So... feel free to join me anytime Betty.

[GolfSpy Barbajo]

Love this post Betty --

 

If you take "golf" out of it, it's really a blueprint for a happy relationship anyway.  I've been married twice and have learned - the hard way - not to try to be a Mr. Fixit. The current Mrs. has explained to me in no uncertain terms that trying to solve her problems is patronizing and dismissive. She doesn't want solutions, just an ear to listen and understand. No reason golf should be any different.  Thanks for sharing!

[Kenny B]

 

Is there a woman in your life who doesn't like to or won't play golf with you? This may be the reason. (BTW, I have never seen these traits in any woman I play golf with).

#1.  When we are on the course, don't give me a golf lesson if I haven't asked for one. Nothing you tell me will ‘fix' anything. These men cannot seem to understand their statements are not helpful and they will continue with their “lesson” round after round. Many have seen the worst in me as I finally lose patience with their unwanted suggestions.  

#2.  If I have hit the ball incorrectly, don't tell me what I did wrong. I will know something will be amiss through my approach, during my swing, at impact, or during my follow-through. I know if it is hit thin, fat, sliced, pulled, or flat-out duffed. You don't criticize and tell your male partners what they have done wrong on every bad shot, yet with a woman golfer, you have to tell her everything she does wrong as if she doesn't already know.

#3. Don't tell me how to drive the cart. Chances are I drive better than you.

#4. Don't treat me like I'm an inferior golfer, that I don't have any understanding of the game, the logistics, or general knowledge of the game.

#5. Don't patronize me!

You may not have even realized that you fit into the category of male golfers which women golfers hate to play golf with. Now that these traits have been exposed, think of what you tell your wife, girlfriend, sister, any woman while she is golfing. Can you in retrospect see how your “helpful” comments are not only a detriment to a fun game but hurtful? Remember that if you are golfing with a woman, show the same respect to her as you would a male golfer. Keep your critiques, criticism, and golf lessons to yourself, and if you must discuss this, wait until the 19th hole.

 

My wife and I play all the time.  She has been playing for 52 years; I've only been playing seriously for 24.  She is about a 17 hcp, and a good player.  This is a lead-in for my comments:

 

#1.  I never give a lesson to anyone on the course while playing for score.  We usually play 9-holes after work for practice, and I will make suggestions to my wife if she is working on something.  Recently, she just put a 60* Vokey in her bag and is having trouble with it.  However, I am limited to one comment.  Anything more and I'm in trouble!!  With that said, I am not adverse to her making comments about my play at all.  If there is something that will help me, I'm all for it!

 

#2.  After we first met, I did this once... I don't do it anymore!!  Enough said.

 

#3.  She doesn't normally drive the cart.  She will if her back is hurting really bad because it doesn't hurt as much when she is holding onto the steering wheel.  However, it screws up both us with the bags.  I have never ridden with another woman, so I have no experience with that.

 

#4.  See the lead-in.  I also never make comments to others that might be in our group.  I do have to bite my tongue at times when we get to the first tee and when another couple shows up, the woman says "This is the first time I've played on a course."  Since my wife is playing from the same tee as her, she is the one that will "give the lesson", not me.  I'm the one that says on the 2nd hole, "We will go on ahead since the next hole is open and let you two play together.  They are usually relieved at that point.

 

#5.  Never.

 

Good thread!  I get the feeling that most people on the forum are not the typical golfers that you might run into on a course.  Most guys probably feel like they are being helpful, but most guys are also probably not qualified to give advice anyway!

[Fireinthehole]

Very good post! Feel like these are lesson for any one to employ.

[geopaas]

Mansplaining at its finest.

 

 

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[silver & black]

I play with a woman that is on our league. I would never think about doing any of the things you stated in your post. She has a short game I would kill for! Most of us males suffer from the same things you hate getting lessons about...lol.