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Funniest (Good Natured) Golf Digs After a Bad Shot?


Middler

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My standard for any shot that is obviously short, and I mean REALLY short.

“Let it develop”.


Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

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Driver -   :srixon-small: ZX 7 9.5° Ventus VeloCore Blue S
Fairway -  Tour Edge Exotics CB2 15° Grafalloy Prolite 35  S

Fairway - Tour Edge Exotics CB2 18° Grafalloy Prolite 35  S

Hybrid - :srixon-small: ZX 18° GD Tour IZ S

2 Iron - :srixon-small: ZU65 18° AeroTech SteelFiber 110icw S

Irons -  :srixon-small: ZX7  Aerotech SteelFiber 110icw  4-Pw 1° flat
Wedges - :cleveland-small: RTX Zipcore Raw 50° 54° 58°  TTGDTI S400 1° flat

Putters -   Cameron Phantom 5x/Odyssey Toulon Stroke Lab Austin/Odyssey 2 Ball DFX/ TaylorMade Spider
Tour Black/Ping Anser F/Scotty Cameron TeI3 Sole Stamp Newport 2. All with different grips, weights, and lengths.
 

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My personal favorite, on putts left short, either "Nice lay up, or, "I don't think I would have layed that one up."

A similar take on a really bad putt, "Well, your speed was off, but at least your line was bad."

After drive "are you closer to green or tee?" First time wearing shorts after winter "you know you're standing OB"  

A beautiful shot that comes up short of the green, usually in water or bunker...

"Looked good... 'til it wasn't."

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We don’t stop playing the game because we get old; we get old because we stop playing the game.”

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My boss made a point to say nice Shank after every shot once... I mean he ain’t lying, I do “Shanks” the ball every time I hit it.  
 

my favorite that I came up with for myself that has gained some traction is:

“There. it. isn’t...!”

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any time someone in our group asks “did you see where that went” the stock answer is “yeah you’re definitely in the water” even if there’s not a puddle around for miles 

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:taylormade-small: SIM2 8º | KuroKage XT 70TX
:taylormade-small: SIM 3W 14º | Fujikura Atmos Black Tour Spec 9TX
:titelist-small: U500 2i | Fujikura Ventus HB Black 10TX
:titelist-small: T100 4-PW | Dynamic Gold X7
::vokey-small: SM6 52* SM8 56* SM8 60* | Dynamic Gold Tour Issue X100
:scotty-small:  Futura 5w

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On 9/4/2020 at 5:17 AM, Buffly said:

These comments about hitting like a girl and implicating they don't hit very far is a pet peeve of mine. 

I want to encourage more women to play the game and, stuff like this does not help. 

If women overhear comments like this then it is very discouraging. 

I'm all for throwing shade but, not at the point of discouraging an entire gender. 

"Muscles shrinking since we all can't go to the gym anymore?" 

"Is that putter too heavy for you?"

"That ball must have lead weights in it?"

"Did you calculate that in Meters instead of Yards again?"

I understand that “hit it Alice” started as “hit it Alliss” after Peter Alliss left one short in a big match. Either Ryder Cup or Walker Cup. 

  • Like 3

14 of the following:

Ping G400 Max

Cobra King F9 Speedback 3 wood

Callaway Big Bertha Heavenwood

Cobra F9 Speedback 7/8 wood set at 23.5 degrees

Taylormade M4 5 hybrid

Callaway Mavrik Max 6-GW

PXG 0211 5-GW

PXG 0211 sand wedge bent to 53 degrees

Maltby M Series+ 54 degree

Ping Glide 3.0 Eye2 58 degree

Ping Sigma 2 Anser

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Buddy tells me when I leave putts short "pull your skirt up Martha". 

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DRIVER: Cobra F9 10.5  Tensei AV Blue 65g

3W- Callway XR PRO 16 stiff

5W- Alpha- Mitsubishi Diamana  Redboard w/band

Irons- Mizuno JPX 919 Tours with S KBS Tour shafts

Hyrbid- TM 4h mid-rescue

Vokey- Vokey SM5 51 degrees,  SM7 Wedges 54 and 58 1/2 half 3 degrees upright

Putter- Taylor Made Rossa Monza Mini Spider

Ball-ProV1 and AVX

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Partner having a bad day: I just don't know what my problem is. 

Me: Loft is your problem my friend. Lack Of F'ing Talent!

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Ping G410, 10.5 5.5 Evenflow , Ping G425 5 wood/ Ping Anser 20 degree hybrid/ Srixon ZX5, 5-PW/ Ping Glide 50,54, & 58ES/ Bettinardi Queen B

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Threw my buddy a ball with a women's name on it and told him I thought he lost it after he left a put short

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Callaway Bag- Rogue Driver, Mavrik Irons and Hybrids, Stroke Labs Putter

Cleveland 3W and Mizuno SW

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When someone curses after a bad swing but the shot ends up ok:  Don’t let your mouth f*** up a good shot. 

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14 of the following:

Ping G400 Max

Cobra King F9 Speedback 3 wood

Callaway Big Bertha Heavenwood

Cobra F9 Speedback 7/8 wood set at 23.5 degrees

Taylormade M4 5 hybrid

Callaway Mavrik Max 6-GW

PXG 0211 5-GW

PXG 0211 sand wedge bent to 53 degrees

Maltby M Series+ 54 degree

Ping Glide 3.0 Eye2 58 degree

Ping Sigma 2 Anser

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After someone blows a putt past the hole.

"Hey it's the same put.. just from the other direction."

the more I practice, the luckier I seem to get..

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:taylormade-small:  SIM Max 7°/ Fujikura MotoreX F1 6X
:cobra-small:  F6 3 Wood 14* / Mitsubishi Diamana Kai'li x5ct XS  
:callaway-small: Epic Flash Hybrid 18* / Mitsubishi Tensei Silver 70g 

post-76102-0-38507100-1525284411_thumb.jpg  TS-1 3 - P / TT DG 105 (S+) 

post-76102-0-38507100-1525284411_thumb.jpg  TSW Wedges - 50/6 + 56/12
:cleveland-small: HB Soft Premier #4 / Golf Pride Pro Only Red Star

 

 

 

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When somebody in the group hits one in the water with a visible splash you'll hear....

The white bass are jumping today!  

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Modern Bag:  Ping G410+ 9*, Accra TourZ X265 M5;  Snake Eyes 18* & 23* Hybrids; Golfsmith Tour Cavity Forged 3i;  Mizuno JPX 900 Forged 5 - PW, PX LZ 6.0;  Cleveland Tour Action 49*, 53*, 57*; PX LZ 6.5 ;  Ping Heppler Fetch;  Ball - Snell MTB-X; Bag - Sun Mountain H2NO 

Classic Bag:  Driver - Wilson Staff Persimmon; 3w - Hogan Speed Slot; 5w - Wilson Staff Tour Block; 3 - pw - Staff Dynapower; sw - Ram Tom Watson;  putter - bullseye standard or flange.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I usually go with the false positivity.

Like when someone pulls their approach long and left into the trees - easy up and down .

When someone slice it miles right into the next fairway - a touch right, not too bad.

When someone duffs a 3w going for a par 5 in 2 - smart layup right there

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2020 TESTER Ben Hogan UiHi 18* Utility Iron

  • Driver: :ping-small: G410 Plus 9*, Oban Gold
  • Hybrids::adams-small:  Super XTD 17* Hybrid Fubuki AX:callaway-small:,  Apex 20* AD-DI 85S, Apex 23* Oban Purple
  • Irons: :srixon-small: Z585 5-6, Z785 7-PW, Modus 120s
  • Wedges: :cleveland-small: RTX4 50, Modus 120x:taylormade-small:, Hi Toe 56 & 60, Modus 120x
  • Putter: :EVNROLL:  ER3 @ 33"
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When someone blazes one way right - "I see you are working the ball right to more right today"

When you crush a drive past your buddy - "Is that a Walmart they are building between your drive and mine?"

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:taylormade-small: M1 10.5 degree driver

image.png.5094bf65d200d3ff7ef5ed059993dfb4.png Tour 16 degree 4 wood

:taylormade-small: M2 3 Hybrid

:taylormade-small: M2 4 Hybrid or image.png.5094bf65d200d3ff7ef5ed059993dfb4.png 939 4 Hybrid

image.png.5094bf65d200d3ff7ef5ed059993dfb4.png 699 Pro Irons 5-AW

:callaway-small: PM Grind 56 degree wedge

:callaway-small: PM Grind 60 degree wedge

:cleveland-small: Frontline Elevado putter

:Snell: MTB-Black

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Similar lines to the Costco between your ball and mine and several others already mentioned.

Also enjoy pulling a Dodgeball line when someone hits one to the trees or just way off target and will have a very difficult next shot. "Bold strategy Cotton, let's see if it pays off for him"

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Driver:  image.png.3c6db1120d888f669e07d4a8f890b3f1.pngMavrik Sub Zero 9* (Set to 10) Ventus Blue 6X

2 Hybrid: :titelist-small: 818 H2 Hybrid Tensei Blue 80 X

3 Hybrid: :titelist-small: 818H2 Fujikura Atmos TS Blue 8X

4 Iron - Srixon ZX 23* Recoil F5

Irons 5-PW: :mizuno-small: MP 18 SC Dynamic Gold AMT X

Gap/Sand Wedge:  :titelist-small: Vokey SM6 49*  SM8 54* 

Lob Wedge:  image.png.3c6db1120d888f669e07d4a8f890b3f1.pngJaws 5 Wedge 58* DG Tour Issue Stiff

Putter:  image.png.cca2328f4144a299c795aa9b8f3bf677.png Inovai 6.0              :scotty-small: Pro Platinum Newport 2 35"  

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That wasn't a slice, that was the whole pie!   I used to use this one a lot.....on a tee shot that I had just hit.

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2020 MGS Hard Rock Challenge

 

SkyCaddie SX400
OGIO Silencer:  Followed by Arccos
:ping-small: G410+, Tensei Orange
:callaway-small:  Mavrik 3w, Evenflow Riptide
:nike-small: Covert 2.0 3H, Kuro Kage Black
:wilson-small:
Wilson D7 Irons 4-GW,  Dynamic Gold AMT
:ping-small: Glide  52, 56 ES
:EVNROLL: ER2
:titelist-small: -ProV1x (left dash)

Romans 10:9

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My personal favorites that are good for any garbage - “I hope you guys are taking notes” _or_ “you just can’t teach that”

Shots struck around the equator of the ball that go bounding over the putting surface - “these greens won’t hold a thing”

Absolutely crushed but miles wide - “at least it’s a _long_ way the wrong way”

The long putt that only makes it halfway to the hole - “good practice for the next one“

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:cobra-small:______S9-1 Pro D - Matrix Ozik XCON 6 S
:cobra-small:______S9-1 Pro 15* - Matrix Ozik XCON 7 S
:nickent-small:________3DX 17* - Matrix Ozik Altus Hybrid SG
:Hogan:______ICON Black 4-PW - KBS Tour V S
:cleveland-small:__________588 RTG 49  RTX 52.10  56.12 - DG S400
BobbyGrace.png.1dc40002fcec0eee8603b71b3e706e89.png______Amazing Grace NYC Tour CS
:taylormade-small:_______'19 TP5X
(the preceding have all been gamer approved)

"The most important shot in golf is the next one“ - Ben Hogan

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  • 3 weeks later...

When someone hits a tee shot out in the crap : Lassie couldn't find that ball if it had bacon wrapped around it.

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Ping G410, 10.5 5.5 Evenflow , Ping G425 5 wood/ Ping Anser 20 degree hybrid/ Srixon ZX5, 5-PW/ Ping Glide 50,54, & 58ES/ Bettinardi Queen B

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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On 9/4/2020 at 6:17 AM, Buffly said:

These comments about hitting like a girl and implicating they don't hit very far is a pet peeve of mine. 

I want to encourage more women to play the game and, stuff like this does not help. 

If women overhear comments like this then it is very discouraging. 

I'm all for throwing shade but, not at the point of discouraging an entire gender. 

"Muscles shrinking since we all can't go to the gym anymore?" 

"Is that putter too heavy for you?"

"That ball must have lead weights in it?"

"Did you calculate that in Meters instead of Yards again?"

The trash talk that contains the likes of "Nice putt Nancy," only take place amonst all male groups.  I played with a young college girl the other week, and I had to remind myself not to make gender specific comments (towards myself) while playing golf with her.

And in the immortal words of Sergeant Hulka from the movie, "Stripes," 

 

 

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  • :ping-small: G400 Driver
  • :callaway-small: XR 4 Fairway 16.5°
  • :mizuno-small: Fli-Hi Utility Iron - 21°
  • :ping-small: G Series 5-9 irons
  • :titelist-small: :vokey-small: SM7 46°, 50°, 54° & 58°
  • :taylormade-small: Ghost Spider S putter
  • :918457628_PrecisionPro:Nexus Laser Rangefinder
  • Garmin Approach S20 GPS
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