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Getting your significant other into the game...


RaginCajun
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I want to hear how you guys got your significant others into the game or vice versa! 

Im just getting serious about golf, got fitted, have lessons scheduled and have played a round a week for the past 2 months with range time in between. My girlfriend saw this and has been hinting at getting started as well. Took her to the range and out of the 30ish balls she hit, more than half had a baby draw on them!! I was floored as my good days are when I can hit the majority of them straight. Her parents are retired and gold damn near everyday in Florida and offered to pay for her clubs and lessons as well. Now I just have to worry about her surpassing me.

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Intellectually maddening, soulfully satisfying 

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My wife decided to take some county-level classes to learn a bit, so she could occasionally play with me when we went on vacations.  That's it, a couple of times a year was all she imagined.  Then she got hooked, and now she plays as much as I do, maybe more.  So what did I do?  Very little.  I listened to her talk about her instruction, so I could help her remember bits of it when she needed help.  I NEVER tried to instruct her myself.  I encouraged her to play, at least some of the time with me, but also to play in ladies' groups.  That's it, she just loves to play, and loves to compete.

As for you, I suggest the same.  Help her get lessons, help her remember the lessons when she needs help, but don't provide your own instruction.  Encourage her when she wants to play, but don't force her to play, or coerce her into joining you.  Encourage her to play with other people, unless you really prefer to have her with you every time she plays.  It has to be her choice to take whatever steps she takes.

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19 minutes ago, DaveP043 said:

My wife decided to take some county-level classes to learn a bit, so she could occasionally play with me when we went on vacations.  That's it, a couple of times a year was all she imagined.  Then she got hooked, and now she plays as much as I do, maybe more.  So what did I do?  Very little.  I listened to her talk about her instruction, so I could help her remember bits of it when she needed help.  I NEVER tried to instruct her myself.  I encouraged her to play, at least some of the time with me, but also to play in ladies' groups.  That's it, she just loves to play, and loves to compete.

As for you, I suggest the same.  Help her get lessons, help her remember the lessons when she needs help, but don't provide your own instruction.  Encourage her when she wants to play, but don't force her to play, or coerce her into joining you.  Encourage her to play with other people, unless you really prefer to have her with you every time she plays.  It has to be her choice to take whatever steps she takes.

I agree 100%. She has to want to and whats the point if its not fun... Its crazy how fast someone can get the golfing bug. Same thing happened with my pops now wife. She just plays for fun, doesnt keep score and can keep up with him. Hes a 14 handicap. 

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Intellectually maddening, soulfully satisfying 

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My lady is just getting into golf. Slow and steady. Only give advice when asked. Let her know how much fun you had playing golf together. Lots of positive reinforcement. 

Praying she gets the bug! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

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I agree with all of the above!!  Encourage, but never provide instruction.  Help her find a good instructor, but let her choose.  It sounds like she has a talent for the game.

My wife started playing in 1964; I started in 1991.  I met her in 1999.  She never could beat me until about a year ago; now she does occasionally but Hey!...  she's 65 and I'm 73; it's going to happen more often every year from now on!!  Doesn't bother me, but it does motivate both of us to improve!  Best of luck!!

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1 hour ago, jddaigneault said:

My lady is just getting into golf. Slow and steady. Only give advice when asked. Let her know how much fun you had playing golf together. Lots of positive reinforcement. 

Praying she gets the bug! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Im hoping positive reinforcement in the form of a starbucks latte after a round or range session will help her catch the bug. 

 

1 hour ago, Kenny B said:

I agree with all of the above!!  Encourage, but never provide instruction.  Help her find a good instructor, but let her choose.  It sounds like she has a talent for the game.

My wife started playing in 1964; I started in 1991.  I met her in 1999.  She never could beat me until about a year ago; now she does occasionally but Hey!...  she's 65 and I'm 73; it's going to happen more often every year from now on!!  Doesn't bother me, but it does motivate both of us to improve!  Best of luck!!

There is no way Id try to give instruction with the current state of my game(trying to break 100). Id give advice went asked, with a very strong disclaimer. 

I find that truly awesome, why be batman and robin when you both can be batman. 

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Intellectually maddening, soulfully satisfying 

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7 minutes ago, RaginCajun said:

Im hoping positive reinforcement in the form of a starbucks latte after a round or range session will help her catch the bug. 

 

There is no way Id try to give instruction with the current state of my game(trying to break 100). Id give advice went asked, with a very strong disclaimer. 

I find that truly awesome, why be batman and robin when you both can be batman. 

Yes! And I recall her being quite excited about this prospect of the 19th hole. She’s not even a big drinker!

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My wife started along with me when I retired. We had stopped cruising on our sailboat and I think she did it only because we were always both involved in all of my preferred activities/sports. She took lots of lessons, did plenty of shopping (fitting, clubs and clothes) and also joined the women's 9 hole league which was more social then golf. Her game took a big turn last summer as her index dropped into the mid 20's (she also won most improved this past year). She now prefers to play 18, joined the 18 hole women's league and has been scouting clubs to join down here in Fl (playing the course not looking at the clubhouse).

Last couple of years she's asked me to go with her to her lessons, so I can remind her of what the instructor said. However, I do not give her instruction. She hates going to the driving range - wish I could convince her otherwise, but I won't push her. Heck she even had me create a distant chart for all of her clubs. 

If I had to do it over again, I'm not sure how to go about it - it just happened. 

 

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Great conversation here.  My wife started playing two years ago.  We keep it to family golf, son is 8 and plays very well, and my daughter (6) that does a great job of running around the green and sometimes putts at the hole.  LOL.  

Another route that got my wife into it was social outings with friends.  We will have 4-5 couples and play alternate shot matches (Scotch with skins) between all of us.  It allows to alleviate pressure on any certain person within the group.  We have dinner and drinks afterward.  We did have a nice glass trophy that the winners would take Fireball shots out of but not surprisingly it broke one evening. Lol.  Make it more about hanging out with friends and in our case... drinking.  

I will close by saying my wife doesn't want to play by herself or anything that serious.  She will play as a family or social which is great by me.

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My wife showed some interest when we first starting dating and I was in college.  Learning from my Dad's story about trying to teach my Mom to drive and subsequently golf, both did not go well, I opted to have her take lessons from at a local course.  If memory serves, we played a couple of 9 hole rounds together at an executive and when the course was not busy.  She made pretty good contact and seemed to be enjoying it.  A couple of lessons later she started developing a couple of blisters and had to take a break from it... we're still on break 🙂

My advice would be to see if she'd be ok with taking lessons and, if so, starting there.  If she takes to it, great.  If not, don't push it.  Good luck.

 

 

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Hey @tony@CIC I know it was a while ago but I found your write up on the c300s very informative and interesting! 

Thats awesome you two share multiple hobbies. I beleive thats key to a healthy relationship even outside of golf! 

17 hours ago, xBAGGS said:

Great conversation here.  My wife started playing two years ago.  We keep it to family golf, son is 8 and plays very well, and my daughter (6) that does a great job of running around the green and sometimes putts at the hole.  LOL.  

Another route that got my wife into it was social outings with friends.  We will have 4-5 couples and play alternate shot matches (Scotch with skins) between all of us.  It allows to alleviate pressure on any certain person within the group.  We have dinner and drinks afterward.  We did have a nice glass trophy that the winners would take Fireball shots out of but not surprisingly it broke one evening. Lol.  Make it more about hanging out with friends and in our case... drinking.  

I will close by saying my wife doesn't want to play by herself or anything that serious.  She will play as a family or social which is great by me.

Thats a great set up you and your friends have! Might have to borrow that, we tend to get a bit to competative sometimes. Things tend to get a little wild when fireball is involved.🤣 

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Intellectually maddening, soulfully satisfying 

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14 hours ago, fixyurdivot said:

My wife showed some interest when we first starting dating and I was in college.  Learning from my Dad's story about trying to teach my Mom to drive and subsequently golf, both did not go well, I opted to have her take lessons from at a local course.  If memory serves, we played a couple of 9 hole rounds together at an executive and when the course was not busy.  She made pretty good contact and seemed to be enjoying it.  A couple of lessons later she started developing a couple of blisters and had to take a break from it... we're still on break 🙂

My advice would be to see if she'd be ok with taking lessons and, if so, starting there.  If she takes to it, great.  If not, don't push it.  Good luck.

 

 

She is pretty nervous about actually playing 9 or 18 so getting onto the course will be the test to see if she enjoys it. Yup! Lessons all the way. 

Intellectually maddening, soulfully satisfying 

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12 minutes ago, RaginCajun said:

Thats a great set up you and your friends have! Might have to borrow that, we tend to get a bit to competative sometimes. Things tend to get a little wild when fireball is involved.🤣 

It is still competitive with the guys.  We will sh*t talk, make fun.  The girls will congregate, socialize, not pay attention...have to keep them on point when its their shot but its still a ton of fun!  

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Hybrid: :755178188_TourEdge: CBX 19* / Atmos Blue 7S

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  • 2 months later...

I tried getting my wife into the game before we had children and she was starting to somewhat get into it.  She preferred just 9 holes, but played many sports in high school and is fairly athletic so she broke 50 pretty quickly.  Her short game is reminiscent of Happy Gilmore before he went to the putt putt course so I've tried to get her to practice chipping and putting and that's where I lose her.

I've not tried to get her back out there since kids and she actually just had surgery on a herniated disc so it may never happen.  My hope is that once I start having my kids go out with me (ages: 6, 4, and 2) in a a few more years, that she will want to join as well.  My oldest does fairly good so far and actually prefers the range to playing at the moment since she can continually hit balls.  

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