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I hate that I have to have this moral dilemma but damn my conscious.  So I have been invited to play the following courses next June:  Del Monte, Pebble Beach, Spanish Bay, Spyglass and Pebble Beach again while staying at the Lodge at Pebble Beach for a cost of $3700...not including air fare from BWI and food, side bets and souvenirs.   I am figuring about 5-6k would be a good approximation for this trip.  Now, as many of you may know, I am a teacher so money is a factor in play while almost everyone going on this trip are millionaires to some degree.  For me, this is a bucket list trip, who wouldn't want to do this trip?!  

Here is my dilemma, I have three children and for that kind of money, I can take my ENTIRE FAMILY to the Caribbean and have a fantastic time.  I am having a hard time trying to justify spending that amount of money on myself when I could use it for my entire family.  The golfer in me says, "go, it's a once in a lifetime trip", while the father in me says the kids will only be around for a few more years, make memories with them and don't be selfish.  

What would you all do? 

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Family. You will never get the same opportunity again with the family. In 10 years you could still accomplish the golf trip.

Especially if she says it's FINE.    As a father of 3 grown kids (oldest 45 youngest 36) I can personally tell you the fondest memories my kids, wife and I have are vacations we took. Espe

What she says: "It's fine, you should go!"   What she means:   LOL, we all know we've gotten that mixed message from our other halves before 🙂

Obviously this depends in part on circumstances none of us can know. If, for instance, your wife is urging you to go on the trip, that changes things. But otherwise, I'm with @cnosil on this: you (and me, for that matter) are at a stage of life that we'll never get to re-live with our kids. There will be years in which I can go on a trip by myself.

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As a father of 3, now adult, daughters, I have to agree with @cnosil and @GolfSpy MPR.  If you have the opportunity to spend the time with family you should.  Kids grow up way too fast to miss out on any opportunities with them.

Just my humble opinion.

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Like Cnosil  and MPR said, it mostly depend on your wife's thoughts. Also had you planned on a family vacation or just using that as a comparison.   

If the wife fully supports it and says a family trip can be done some other time, then I'd do it. But if there is the least bit of doubt in her mind or she thinks a family vacation has higher priority at this time, then the answer is easy.

Another thing to consider is the guilt factor, even if you get 100% blessing from her, would you be able to fully enjoy the trip or would you feel guility about it before during and after, that could possibly take away some of the enjoyment. 

 

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Talk about it with the wife. That’s the answer

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So you all are reflecting my thoughts exactly.  For the record, my wife says she understands and has no problem with me going.....but GUYS SERIOUSLY, we know that could have two vastly different meanings.  haha

Man does this suck.  

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56 minutes ago, ballplayer002003 said:

I hate that I have to have this moral dilemma but damn my conscious.  So I have been invited to play the following courses next June:  Del Monte, Pebble Beach, Spanish Bay, Spyglass and Pebble Beach again while staying at the Lodge at Pebble Beach for a cost of $3700...not including air fare from BWI and food, side bets and souvenirs.   I am figuring about 5-6k would be a good approximation for this trip.  Now, as many of you may know, I am a teacher so money is a factor in play while almost everyone going on this trip are millionaires to some degree.  For me, this is a bucket list trip, who wouldn't want to do this trip?!  

Here is my dilemma, I have three children and for that kind of money, I can take my ENTIRE FAMILY to the Caribbean and have a fantastic time.  I am having a hard time trying to justify spending that amount of money on myself when I could use it for my entire family.  The golfer in me says, "go, it's a once in a lifetime trip", while the father in me says the kids will only be around for a few more years, make memories with them and don't be selfish.  

What would you all do? 

Man that is a tough one, but to be very honest, despite wanting to take that trip, I am choosing family.

The memories of spending time with my son on the local muni are for sure much more cherished than any other golf experience I could have.

Off course the wife is a deciding factor, as in most marriages.

 

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1 minute ago, ballplayer002003 said:

So you all are reflecting my thoughts exactly.  For the record, my wife says she understands and has no problem with me going.....but GUYS SERIOUSLY, we know that could have two vastly different meanings.  haha

Man does this suck.  

You know your wife and your relationship better than any of us. 

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1 minute ago, ballplayer002003 said:

So you all are reflecting my thoughts exactly.  For the record, my wife says she understands and has no problem with me going.....but GUYS SERIOUSLY, we know that could have two vastly different meanings.  haha

Man does this suck.  

Those words.

giphy.gif

 

giphy.gif

 

 

 

 

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I couldn't do it. Our biggest trip will be going back home to Australia at some stage. For my wife, it'll be her second time. It will be my son's first trip "home", first time seeing his sisters and other relatives and he's 14 right now. 

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2 minutes ago, MattF said:

I couldn't do it. Our biggest trip will be going back home to Australia at some stage. For my wife, it'll be her second time. It will be my son's first trip "home", first time seeing his sisters and other relatives and he's 14 right now. 

We are planning our own trip down under soon, well as soon as it is safe to travel to Brazil with the whole Covid situation, we are hoping some time next year, it will be the first time for both the wife and our son.

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I'm always driving around Michigan. 

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Grip it and rip it my friends. 

 

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We are planning our own trip down under soon, well as soon as it is safe to travel to Brazil with the whole Covid situation, we are hoping some time next year, it will be the first time for both the wife and our son.
Nice! What part of Brazil?

I lived in the NE in Natal many many years ago (late 90's) haven't been back since but would love to take the fam.

the more I practice, the luckier I seem to get..

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3 minutes ago, azstu324 said:

Nice! What part of Brazil?

I lived in the NE in Natal many many years ago (late 90's) haven't been back since but would love to take the fam.

the more I practice, the luckier I seem to get..
 

I was born and raised about 100 miles from Brasilia, about as center of the country as one can get.

https://bit.ly/30nYRYL

 

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Honk If you see these plates around. 

20200728_121856.jpg.9cf8a7d26ca1096e8d390a8c2f59b6c2.jpg

I'm always driving around Michigan. 

The Ohio and Pennsylvania's turnpike as well as around Baltimore, Maryland. 

Grip it and rip it my friends. 

 

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1 hour ago, ballplayer002003 said:

I hate that I have to have this moral dilemma but damn my conscious.  So I have been invited to play the following courses next June:  Del Monte, Pebble Beach, Spanish Bay, Spyglass and Pebble Beach again while staying at the Lodge at Pebble Beach for a cost of $3700...not including air fare from BWI and food, side bets and souvenirs.   I am figuring about 5-6k would be a good approximation for this trip.  Now, as many of you may know, I am a teacher so money is a factor in play while almost everyone going on this trip are millionaires to some degree.  For me, this is a bucket list trip, who wouldn't want to do this trip?!  

Here is my dilemma, I have three children and for that kind of money, I can take my ENTIRE FAMILY to the Caribbean and have a fantastic time.  I am having a hard time trying to justify spending that amount of money on myself when I could use it for my entire family.  The golfer in me says, "go, it's a once in a lifetime trip", while the father in me says the kids will only be around for a few more years, make memories with them and don't be selfish.  

What would you all do? 

I can only say...  do you think you could actually enjoy the golf trip?

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17 minutes ago, Kenny B said:

I can only say...  do you think you could actually enjoy the golf trip?

I would only enjoy the golf, but after each round I think it would eat me up knowing how selfish that decision would be.  I am definitely choosing the family over the friends and I make this decision with ease, but there is always that tiny devil on my shoulder just laughing.   

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13 minutes ago, xOldBenKenobiX said:

I was born and raised about 100 miles from Brasilia, about as center of the country as one can get.

https://bit.ly/30nY

17 minutes ago, xOldBenKenobiX said:

I was born and raised about 100 miles from Brasilia, about as center of the country as one can get.

https://bit.ly/30nYRYL

 

RYL

 

That's awesome! 

One of these days I'll get the family down there. My Portuguese could really use some brushing up though. Back then I was o gallegao bem falado. I picked up the Nordestinho accent pretty well and would translate for some of the Paulistas that came through who couldn't understand what the locals were saying and vise/versa 😛 

Imagine you lived in the in Kentucky and picked up the accent pretty well, and someone from New York or CA came to visit, and YOU had to actually translate English for the 2.. that happened to me all the time. 

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@ballplayer002003
I don’t have kids, but I imagine that your life since they’ve been around has been sacrificing for their sake: I don’t think it’s selfish to do something entirely for yourself unless it’s at their expense. How many prime golf years do you have left? Will there be a better opportunity? For people who settled down immediately after school, I think it’s only natural to want to do something for yourself before you get too old to actually enjoy it. Then again, I spent my 20’s traveling and snowboarding without a care in the world...




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4 minutes ago, azstu324 said:

That's awesome! 

One of these days I'll get the family down there. My Portuguese could really use some brushing up though. Back then I was o gallegao bem falado. I picked up the Nordestinho accent pretty well and would translate for some of the Paulistas that came through who couldn't understand what the locals were saying and vise/versa 😛 

Imagine you lived in the in Kentucky and picked up the accent pretty well, and someone from New York or CA came to visit, and YOU had to actually translate English for the 2.. that happened to me all the time. 

It is funny but true, the regional dialects and accents can mean a completely different Portuguese from north to south. 

I think my favorite accent and linguistic mannerisms outside of our regional own, is the one from people of Bahia, that everything is okay and calm on their voices was always intoxicating.

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Right Handed, Southeast Michigan

Honk If you see these plates around. 

20200728_121856.jpg.9cf8a7d26ca1096e8d390a8c2f59b6c2.jpg

I'm always driving around Michigan. 

The Ohio and Pennsylvania's turnpike as well as around Baltimore, Maryland. 

Grip it and rip it my friends. 

 

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As a fellow father of three... I don't think I couldn't take that trip right now, as much as that kills me to say.  I do go on two golf trips each year (Spring and Fall) but they're 1. relatively cheap (family friends place in Spring and off-season rates for the fall) and 2.  They're 2 days of golf, and a few hours drive away.

Based on what you're saying it seems like you'd feel guilty on the trip, and maybe not enjoy it to the degree that you would want to.  I'd hate to feel guilty during that trip.

 

But as some other guys have mentioned... really talk about it with your wife!  It is a bucket list trip for sure, but kids grow up too damn fast.

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