Yellow Ball Roast's

[chisag 17,616]

... Well, well, well. I played with my 3 Asian friends today and they were shocked at the racial slur name being used. They were not happy giving "the Y word ball" the finger in protest.  

[Yellow Ball 1,160]

17 hours ago, chisag said:

... Well, well, well. I played with my 3 Asian friends today and they were shocked at the racial slur name being used. They were not happy giving "the Y word ball" the finger in protest.  

I am honored. So many golfers out there think I am #1. 

[Kenny B 32,382]

2 hours ago, Yellow Ball said:

I am honored. So many golfers out there think I am #1. 

Yeah... looking out for #1 and stepped in #2.  

[Yellow Ball 1,160]

Happy weekend everyone. Don't forget to set you clocks back!

Yelllow Ball has noticed many of you starting to have problems in the fall golf season. Some might be getting burnt out, some have injuries, losing balls in the leaves, or just needing a break to re-focus. You know who you are. Let’s just take a peek at @cnosil this fall shall we.

He was convinced it was time for a new putter due to his poor putting performance on the greens. But then it shifted to his pitching and chipping. We all know he was working hard on pitching and chipping this season. The "How did you practice thread" was full of his hard work. But in one round he still had pitch shots roll back to his feet not once but it happened three times. He wound up with three triples in that round.

Then on another round he said and I quote ”It was a Yellow Ball kind of day”  So it is becoming very clear to me that I have now become an official excuse for poor golf play even when I wasn’t there to impart my havoc on the golfing community. I’m not sure how to take this. Should I be offended or should I take this as having achieved star status?  Yellow Ball an official excuse. I think I love it!

 

So moving on to another round where he only hit 8 fairways, hit 2 greens in regulation, had 34 putts, and lost 5 balls. So it all just seems a little strange to me that @cnosil is now dabbling into heads up putting. We all can see that is not where the focus needs to be!

Just me thinking out loud here.

With all the Most Wanted Testing, the practice, and the golf, I couldn’t even fathom the amount of balls he hits each season. You would think he would get a little lesson help from HQ. @cnosil is high on the list of the most encouraging people in the forum always supporting, giving advice, and caring. So let’s return the favor for a minute here.

Thanks for all you do. We believe in you. You can get this game under control. (Unless I'm there)

[chisag 17,616]

3 hours ago, Yellow Ball said:

Happy weekend everyone. Don't forget to set you clocks back!

 

... I refuse and I will NOT set my clock back and you can't make me do it! 

[Yellow Ball 1,160]

19 hours ago, chisag said:

 

... I refuse and I will NOT set my clock back and you can't make me do it! 

We wouldn't want anyone from Arizona to do it. Extra daylight for you would mean longer exposure  to sun and heat. This would only help to fry your brains even more. 

Case in point.

So you pick on YB with a racial undertone because his name is Yellow Ball. Then you say you were playing with your 3 Asian friends instead of saying you were playing with 3 friends.  Hmmmmm I think someone needs to go to sensitivity training....... And I think their finger was directed at the wrong guy.

Too much Arizona heat maybe?

[chisag 17,616]

2 hours ago, Yellow Ball said:

So you pick on YB with a racial undertone because his name is Yellow Ball. Then you say you were playing with your 3 Asian friends instead of saying you were playing with 3 friends.  Hmmmmm I think someone needs to go to sensitivity training....... And I think their finger was directed at the wrong guy.

 

... Great obfuscation, will you be running for congress soon? Of course James, Scott and David said "tell Y Word ball your Asian friends are calling him out" and then they gave you their salute. With your response, I kinda feel silly now for defending you as I told them "Well, he actually is a YELLOW ball so I am not sure what else we can call him". 

[cksurfdude 10,346]

Took a pal of YB's out for some practice this afternoon..

...and then here we are on the patio at The 19th Hole..

[cksurfdude 10,346]

40 minutes ago, chisag said:

"Well, he actually is a YELLOW ball so I am not sure what else we can call him". 

I think you meant "them" as it seems to be termed these days .. so maybe something like...

"My differently optically-abled golf friend"

..or..

They're "spectrally respectful"

..or maybe even..

"Chromatically woke"

[Kenny B 32,382]

7 minutes ago, cksurfdude said:

I think you meant "them" as it seems to be termed these days .. so maybe something like...

"My differently optically-abled golf friend"

..or..

They're "spectrally respectful"

..or maybe even..

"Chromatically woke"

Thank you... our cultural sherpa!  

[JohnSmalls 6,762]

11 hours ago, cksurfdude said:

"Chromatically woke"

The internet has been won.

[tony@CIC 21,989]

Dear @Yellow Ball, I need some advice. We're back in Ohio for a couple of weeks and I've been able to play in somewhat reasonable temps (sunshine and low 50's). As you can see the temp here today is a bit chillier. 

My shiny white balls are turning blue.  Is this temporary and/or is there a cure? 

 

[Yellow Ball 1,160]

Dear Tony in Ohio,

What is this turning into? A dear Abbey column?

It is becoming clear to me that you need a little more advise than some others. This is disappointing.

So trying to be as tactful as YB can be, if you don't want your balls to turn blue then keep them between the sheets and active! But if you get soft balls in the winter like Kenny then I can't help you.

If you insist on taking them out in the cold you can try one of those hand warmer packs in your pocket. This keeps them all warm.  This reminds me of a song. By Jerry Lee Lewis "Great Balls of Fire"

[Yellow Ball 1,160]

As I am working my way to a more comfortable climate I stopped to check in on @PMookie. I felt the need to give him some crap. Here’s a guy with a plate full. First let’s just say I think he is trying to compete with @dlow206 in regard to equipment changes. Seems like he is always going to a fitting (Edel, Honma, Cobra) to name a few. From my count it looks like he changed every club in his bag. I guess he’s not a big reader though or he would know you CAN’T BUY A GAME!

If you could we would all be in the bottom of the cup in less strokes!

So a little while back he took me on his trip to Texas. We played a hard narrow sloping type course and he pretty much cried like a baby. Give the guy a challenge and he falls apart. He shoots an 88 and never wants to go back. Waaa waaa waaa! Boy he was starting to sound like @Kenny B. If I took him to some of the courses I’ve been on he would probably just give up playing all together! Embrace the challenge man! Do you know how many golfers dream about shooting an 88? Tons!

But if your more comfortable being back on those LA courses (with wider fairways) we understand. If you could get that driver straightened out it wouldn’t be long before you got close to breaking 70.

Here is the YB challenge. If you take your average number of fairways hit per round and you increase it by two by the Masters in 2022, I will promise not to wreak havoc on you next season.

 

[tony@CIC 21,989]

Hmmm @Yellow Ballwith @PMookie in LA? Boy YB certainly gets around or maybe just A round. 

 

 

[Yellow Ball 1,160]

3 minutes ago, tony@CIC said:

Hmmm @Yellow Ballwith @PMookie in LA? Boy YB certainly gets around or maybe just A round. 

 

 

Love to tell you that I got a lot of frequent flier miles. But they don't give you sh#t when you travel in baggage. The only miles I ever got was when @dlow206 paid for my trip out his way. 

[Yellow Ball 1,160]

Hi everyone,

Normally you would read this to see who I raked over the coals this week. Well I’m sorry to disappoint you but suck it up! This is the week of Thanksgiving and I thought it would be more appropriate to actually show my appreciation.

Looking to add a little humor I started this thread back in August on a whim. Shout out to Matt as “The Hat” inspired me! I can say that this is the first time I ever used my “Creative Writing” class I took in college a very long time ago.

This has been fun bring my little friend to life so to speak. By all the laughing emoji’s I can tell some of you are enjoying this. I would like to say thanks to all of you for posting your stories so I can manipulate them into a little adventure.

I will tell you I do get some strange looks from people when I am staging a photo. Taking the pictures on the airplane was interesting. I was worried about getting my friends through security. It took a few legs of a trip to get it right. I thought the guy on the aisle seat was asleep when I put my little guy in the middle seat. He wasn’t. He said “What the heck are you doing?” I said don’t worry I’m writing a story. He just shook his head. This was while the plane was boarding. Then a guy actually came to sit in the middle seat. So I just turned that around a bit and fish taco’s was born. So next flight I switched balls to the poop ball in the seat. I waited until the plane was in the air for the window shot. I didn’t want to be kicked off the plane. I also had to wait until my boss fell asleep who was sitting next to me. Then the flight attendant saw me with YB stuck on the window as I was taking the picture. She wasn’t all too pleased. Maybe she thought YB had a fuse up his ass or something. I had to show her the pictures in my phone from other shots. Then she was ok (sort of). Lucky my boss didn’t wake up because that would have been a fun conversation.

 The bar scene was a challenge. Had to ask the bartender to dim the lights a bit and asked the people to stay out of the shot, checked the mirrors, and got the angles right. It came close to me having to buy drinks. But since the bar was at a course it went over pretty well.  

So far I have picked on around 23 of you and you all deserved it! Oops I meant to say you all took it well!  I love all the come backs and the challenge it gives me to reply creatively. I’m looking forward to taking my friend on more adventures.

Let’s all give thanks for all that we have and the enjoyment this game has given us. For those traveling next week be safe.

I'm off to my next adventure....... See one of you soon!

[MattF 14,103]

You're welcome YB. @The Hat is laid up for the winter and as near as I can tell, he's asleep.

[Rickp 28,521]

34 minutes ago, MattF said:

You're welcome YB. @The Hat is laid up for the winter and as near as I can tell, he's asleep.

@The Hat is only Hibernating!

[The Hat 128]

11 hours ago, MattF said:

You're welcome YB. @The Hat is laid up for the winter and as near as I can tell, he's asleep.

 

11 hours ago, Rickp said:

@The Hat is only Hibernating!

@Rickp is right you clown, I'm not sleeping... I'm laying in wait.