Fun vs. Frustration

[ccostel18]

Just curious….what percentage of your game is fun and what percentage is frustrating? I am currently operating on a 60% fun 40% frustrating at the moment.  I think I play my best golf when those numbers skew more to the 75-80% fun range. 
 

Also, what tactics do you use to push those number towards the fun side when your frustration percentage creeps up?

[MNUte]

20 hours ago, ccostel18 said:

Also, what tactics do you use to push those number towards the fun side when your frustration percentage creeps up?

Honestly, it's a combo of actively putting ego aside, talking through the issues out loud, and then saying the positives out loud as well in greater volume. 

E.g, yesterday I played a new course for the first time that was very difficult. Because of work stress and baby stress, I didn't  get to practice or get enough sleep all week. And thanks to a last minute work call and lots of fires, I didn't get to warm up and was on my phone between shots for the first few holes. Needless to say, I did poorly. Even worse, I was getting embarrased in front of my friends, which was tanking my play even more. 

So....I started talking to myself. I told myself I was setting my expectations too high for a brand new tough course playing long with no practice when I'm already a bogey golfer that struggles off the tee. I then thanked my friends for taking the time to enjoy a gorgeous day at a beautiful course with me, shifted the conversation to sports and my friend's new baby, and made sure I was praising them for playing great golf. For the back 9, I grabbed a beer and moved up to the shorter tees so I was only hitting my hybrid that I was far more comfortable with. Proceeded to shoot much better, score a few birdies, and enjoy myself far more.

 

[cnosil]

20 hours ago, ccostel18 said:

Just curious….what percentage of your game is fun and what percentage is frustrating? I am currently operating on a 60% fun 40% frustrating at the moment.  I think I play my best golf when those numbers skew more to the 75-80% fun range. 
 

Also, what tactics do you use to push those number towards the fun side when your frustration percentage creeps up?

Golf in general is fun; yet hitting lots of bad shots can be frustrating.  I am probably always at 95% fun 5% frustration.  Even if I am frustrated I am still having fun.  The frustration results in my wanting to practice and play more which is fun.    For me I think my general personality keeps me with a high % fun value.  Ultimately this is a game that I have chosen to play;  it doesn't determine my ability to provide for my family or become important enough to be constantly frustrated.   

[ccostel18]

1 hour ago, cnosil said:

Ultimately this is a game that I have chosen to play;  it doesn't determine my ability to provide for my family or become important enough to be constantly frustrated. 

Wow! Such a simple and obvious observation that (embarrassingly) I really have never thought about or told myself. I struggle because I played soccer competitively from my childhood through my early 20s and have always had a drive to succeed. I too often bring that competitive nature into my golf game where it really has no business being. I trained daily for years to compete at a high level in soccer. I constantly have to remind myself that golf is a hobby and an outlet to enjoy not only time with friends, but to get away from the daily stresses we all face. When I quiet that drive to be better than I really need to be at this game is when I play my best and really enjoy it the most. Funny how easily we are able to sabotage joy in our lives. 

[ccostel18]

2 hours ago, MNUte said:

Honestly, it's a combo of actively putting ego aside, talking through the issues out loud, and then saying the positives out loud as well in greater volume. 

Good point!  Perhaps I need to record small positive voice memos and play them back when I hit a bad shot or have a bad round. Better yet, maybe I will have my kids record them so it would really put into perspective what is important. 

[cnosil]

43 minutes ago, ccostel18 said:

Wow! Such a simple and obvious observation that (embarrassingly) I really have never thought about or told myself. I struggle because I played soccer competitively from my childhood through my early 20s and have always had a drive to succeed. I too often bring that competitive nature into my golf game where it really has no business being. I trained daily for years to compete at a high level in soccer. I constantly have to remind myself that golf is a hobby and an outlet to enjoy not only time with friends, but to get away from the daily stresses we all face. When I quiet that drive to be better than I really need to be at this game is when I play my best and really enjoy it the most. Funny how easily we are able to sabotage joy in our lives. 

You can still be competitive and try to excel,  but like I said even if you are competing in local or national events it isn't going to make or break your life.   

[GolfSpy_BEN]

90%-95% fun. I’ve probably been more frustrated at times, but over the past 30+ years of playing this game, I’m mostly just happy to be there. I have 2 thoughts regarding golf that I keep ever present. 1) I am an imperfect person playing a perfect game. This helps me keep bad shots and missed putts in perspective. 2) With apologies and credit to Ted Lasso, I use the goldfish approach. In that I stop thinking about my last shot good or bad precisely 10 seconds after it occurs.