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Poor Etiquette


wade410

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Sorry a little rant here even after waiting a week to write this

 

Does your partner's etiquette affect your play? Let me give an example. Last weekend I played a round with three guys I play with fairly often, looking back I probably added 5 strokes at least due to two of the other player's poor etiquette.

Just after I drop three balls on the putting green my partner I am riding with tell me to stop wasting time we need to get into line for the first hole. So we hurry to the first tee and wait for the group in-front of us tee off. So I start the round with no warm up at all. First hole went fairly well but putted poor.

 

On the second, tee off and get to the second shot I am up third so me and my partner pull into the middle of the fairway he gets out and walks to his ball. While he is walking to his ball I get out reach for my 4 hybrid which I have only played one round with and it is not in my bag. A moment of panic thinking that I left it at home turns to frustration when I see my playing partner walking back after taking his shot with my club. He comments how much he likes it I politely take it back and tell him that it is an older model which can be had for not too much online. His reply “if I buy a new club it will match my new set I only like Taylor Made”. Shaking my head I walk up to my ball setup half pissed off at my partner, swing and take a huge divot just behind the ball moving it some. My partner then reply's “well that's a stroke”. I setup again take a breath, swing again and put the ball about 50 yards from the green and between the two bunkers and chipped and putted out.

 

On to the fifth my partners hit a bad drive that ends up in the rough sitting among a bunch of tree roots. He pulls a club and sets up I watch him set up and notice the blue shaft of the club he has. Well he did it again took my NEW hybrid didn't even ask and was swinging it through tree roots. He hits it off the toe and putts it across the fairway into the rough on the other side. It comes up for him to hit again, he is still about 240 yards out ball laying level on the ground no high grass around it. I pull my fairway out and ask him if he would like to try it. He takes the club looks at his ball and says ”when you hit these the ball needs to be up a little bit” after he says that he moves his ball back about a foot to a spot where he put the ball up on some grass and hits it. Good hit but catches a tree and lands in the middle of the fairway. I skull a pitch for my third shot and hit it way past the green. As I get up to the green I see a ball come back from where my landed.

 

Still on the fifth. The other club member in the foursome pitches what he though was his ball back from the rough behind the green. I ask him if he saw any other balls back there he says no and ask what I am playing. Turns out that we are playing the same brand but mine are marked with a black bomb. He points to the ball lying on the fringe and says there's your ball heads back and starts looking for his. I let everyone who is farther out hit to the green and go to pitch on. With no green to the pin and a nasty downhill lye to pitch from I catch the ball with the lip of my club and send it rolling fast past the hole and across the green then the other member puts out his putter and stops the ball. I ask him to go ahead and pick it up but he just leaves it and walks away.

 

And it just goes on from there being told to take drops after looking for only a little bit, rushed shots, two people hitting at the same time, people stepping in the line for others putts. By the time I got home I was really frustrated with the whole round, and what takes the cake was that there was no one behind us. Anyway I feel that my partners probably cost me at least 5 strokes on prenatally and mental errors alone. Now I am not a good player but it is still frustrating to lose stokes because of others bad etiquette.

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Welcome to MGS, Wade!

 

Why do you even bother playing with such inconsiderate people?

You mention you play fairly often with them, so I assume this is not the first time they have done that.

Do you have any obligation to put up with them (i.e. one of them is your boss or friends forever, etc.)?

If I were you, I would look for new flight partners or rather play alone.

 

But to answer your question, yes, bad etiquette definitely affects my play as well. Golf is so mental, you just can't swing when you are pissed off or thinking about the pitch mark that ******* didn't repair.

 

When I'm raging, I'll swing with 150% power and the thins, fats, shanks, etc. start creeping out.

 

My advice, play with people you are comfortable with. Golf is the only time of the week I can be calm, get some fresh air and exercise. No need to have some jackass ruin my day.

Use my clubs without even asking? Preposterous!

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Thanks for the replies I waited a week and it still turned int to a rant sorry.

 

Currently I prefer to play alone when I get a chance.

 

These two are my in laws so I am stuck with them. I took up golf late 2010 because my wife enjoys it, well in 2011 she had a serious illness that left her unable to play that year. She can play this year but it still bothers her back some. So being new to golf I went with her father and brother (my partner). Every time I play with them I never saw my game in-prove. Other than giving me some time away from my mother in-law and sister in law, I always felt frustrated after playing a round with them. Now I am taking golf more serious and I am starting to notice why. The worst of it this was not them at their worst we played a Donald Ross course in French Lick IN once and I have never payed to be that miserable in my life.

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I was going to say to ditch those guys, but obviously if they're family, you can't. You have to take rounds like that for what they are; I probably play to a 12-15 handicap, when playing with my close family, because of the same reasons you listed. It does suck that you were playing French Lick though. If you ever want to play a "serious" round and not play by yourself, hit me up, I'd be glad to go. If you ever have Thursdays off, Quail Crossing is $45 for all you can play, with a cart. It's a great time to play a tougher course and work on your game, at a good price.

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Only real way that my playing partners effect my play is if it somehow effects my mental state and or tempo. I have to keep level headed and relaxed, if I get angry about anything it tosses off my focus and causes my tempo to get fast.

 

On the second, tee off and get to the second shot I am up third so me and my partner pull into the middle of the fairway he gets out and walks to his ball. While he is walking to his ball I get out reach for my 4 hybrid which I have only played one round with and it is not in my bag. A moment of panic thinking that I left it at home turns to frustration when I see my playing partner walking back after taking his shot with my club. He comments how much he likes it I politely take it back and tell him that it is an older model which can be had for not too much online. His reply “if I buy a new club it will match my new set I only like Taylor Made”. Shaking my head I walk up to my ball setup half pissed off at my partner, swing and take a huge divot just behind the ball moving it some. My partner then reply's “well that's a stroke”. I setup again take a breath, swing again and put the ball about 50 yards from the green and between the two bunkers and chipped and putted out.

Well first off I flat say something to the person about it, I don't let that slide at all, depending on my relationship to that person (boss, friend, employee, random person) would depend on how nice I phrase the statement. Secondly, never ever try to make a swing not 100% focused on the shot, it almost always results in a bad shot.

 

On to the fifth my partners hit a bad drive that ends up in the rough sitting among a bunch of tree roots. He pulls a club and sets up I watch him set up and notice the blue shaft of the club he has. Well he did it again took my NEW hybrid didn't even ask and was swinging it through tree roots. He hits it off the toe and putts it across the fairway into the rough on the other side. It comes up for him to hit again, he is still about 240 yards out ball laying level on the ground no high grass around it. I pull my fairway out and ask him if he would like to try it. He takes the club looks at his ball and says ”when you hit these the ball needs to be up a little bit” after he says that he moves his ball back about a foot to a spot where he put the ball up on some grass and hits it. Good hit but catches a tree and lands in the middle of the fairway. I skull a pitch for my third shot and hit it way past the green. As I get up to the green I see a ball come back from where my landed.

Again, by saying something the first time this should have eliminated the second time the b**** took the club without asking. If it happened a second time I have the philosophy of First time shame on you, second time shame on me for letting it happen twice and it won't happen a third time. If I didn't say something the first time I sure as hell do this time, and if i did say something the first time this time it gets osculated appropriately as needed.

 

Still on the fifth. The other club member in the foursome pitches what he though was his ball back from the rough behind the green. I ask him if he saw any other balls back there he says no and ask what I am playing. Turns out that we are playing the same brand but mine are marked with a black bomb. He points to the ball lying on the fringe and says there's your ball heads back and starts looking for his. I let everyone who is farther out hit to the green and go to pitch on. With no green to the pin and a nasty downhill lye to pitch from I catch the ball with the lip of my club and send it rolling fast past the hole and across the green then the other member puts out his putter and stops the ball. I ask him to go ahead and pick it up but he just leaves it and walks away.

Assuming that I had already told this idiot two times about not being a d-bag, and then he pulled this stunt I would just go "by the way add 2 strokes to your score for playing the wrong ball." I would make it a point to hit him with every PS I could think off the rest of the day. Given this was the 5th hole I stop at the turn and tell them nice day and if I wanted to continue I would wait until they were out of site and play behind them. I don't keep playing with people that get on my last nerve.

 

 

 

I had a situation where I used to play golf at my old job with my boss's boss (he was a vp over the department). This guy was the rudest most pain in the ass I have ever meet playing golf. I just stopped playing with him, he effected my play because it effected my mental state, I really couldn't be that big of an ass to him bc it was indirectly my boss at the time. Best thing to do is separate yourself from that situation as much as possible...

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These two are my in laws so I am stuck with them.

 

LOL then you are ******!!! :lol:

Kidding aside, there are ways to avoid playing with people you are stuck with.

 

My former supervisor is an ******* and his wife is the slowest player I've ever seen. My wife and I started playing golf with them so we were also kind of stuck with them. See them everyday at work and stuff.

 

Eventually, my wife and I figured a way to avoid them. We would wake up really early and by the time they got to the course, we would be half-way done. If they wanted to play together at a certain hour, we could always decline with the excuse (a real reason actually) that we don't like to play during crowded tee times. And we know they are not able to wake up at 6am like us.

 

After a while, they'll play by themselves and we play by ourselves or with people that we like.

 

This is also the reason why a lot of couples at our home course don't play together. They've been married for years, but can't stand each other on the course. What do you do? According to them, they are honest about it and they each play with their friends and never play in the same flight with the spouse.

 

Of course, it also depends on the relationship you have with your wife. If I don't like my brother or father in law, I'll tell my wife directly and she won't make me do anything with them. But that really depends how your wife takes it :lol:

 

Good luck!

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Jbone I might have to take you up on that does Quail require spikes

 

Steven I talked too my wife about it her response was that is how they always are. I get along better with her father and brother than her mother and sister so I will take the best of the bad situation. I usually don't take my game that serious when I am with them but it just kind of added up so far this year. For fathers day my wife set up a round with them at one of the much nicer local courseses, I didn't want to go, for one the green fee was more than my irons cost second she was not going to be there. I can put up with a lot more when I am with her. Needless to say I had a horrid round and ther attitudesds did not help. Sincese then things have added up and I just needed to vent.

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If you can't say anything to them, make sure you wife goes with you and then share a cart with her, it'll make it a lot harder for them to affect your play if you only see them on the green and tee box.

 

Otherwise, you can say you want to walk for the exercise and avoid them as much as possible.

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Steven I talked too my wife about it her response was that is how they always are.

 

wd's advice is good!

 

But that is no excuse to be an ass. Imagine me going up to you, punch you in the face and "oh please forgive me, that's just the way I am, deal with it"

 

In no way do I mean to tell you how to run your marriage, God forbid! But again, that's just me.

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Well okay I had my mouth open the entire time I read the original post.

 

Good lesson in patience and focus I suppose trying not to let someone you're playing with bother you. If you have to play with them you need to learn to ignore their behavior while trying to teach - for example you can walk up to someone's line and then stop and say - "Joe, where's your mark I don't want to walk across your line."

 

I don't think I'd ever tolerate someone just taking one of my clubs out of my bag and hitting it unannounced - I would say something regardless of who it was - I'd have to - I'd hate to harbor bad thoughts about that person.

 

I have a very good friend whom I play with a lot who loves to tell stories and can't seem to stop even once we have the tee - I play fast and I'm often playing first - sometimes the stories continue into my set up - I'll just back off once but if it happens a second time I'll simply say, "It's time to hit."

 

Don't be afraid to be courteous but assertive. Could be they don't know any better.

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RP hate to hear of anyone going through that good luck. I didn't say it was my in-law because I didn't want this post to turn into I hate my in-laws rant. They are actually fairly nice people just very very self absorbed

My Bag

Driver Diablo Edge

Fairway Nickent DX 3 and 5

Hybrid Nickent DT 3 and 4 hybrid

Iron VR Pro Combo5-pw

Wedge Adams Idea Pro 60 and 56

Putter STX X-Form 1

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Today, we played 6 man Wolf. One of the guys actually brought his young, 8 yo, grand son with him. I will first say that I am all for bringing kids to the course. And I am all for kids spending time with their parents or grand parents. You see where this is going don't you? To further set the stage, today it was humid, temperature was 101* when we finished the round, and there was not a breath of wind at the time. So with 6 people in the group it was slow, plus factor in allowing this kid to hit, made for a slow round and it was hot.

 

It was not any hotter than I was playing. After nine holes, I was even par and up $20. On the 10th hole, I had a four foot birdie putt and just as I transitioned from my back swing to forward swing with my putter, this little darling walked into my line of vision, between me and the hole from behind me, and I missed the hole by a foot. The guys thought this was rather humorous. I did not. First off, because I look at the hole and not the ball, I have a wider field of perifial vision than most people. So everyone knows how pissed off I get when they start to move during my swing. I mean, come on, it is just a few seconds. I wait until every one is settle before I putt. And all I ask for is about 20 seconds still and quiet. I do the same for you.

 

On the next hole, I am still not quite over the putt but I get up when it is my turn, and as I am taking my back swing, the little darling walks into my field of vision again, and I hit it into the coolies where it bounces off a rock and I later find my ball but I am in knee high grass 420 yards from the hole. On the same hole, one of the guys, wolfed it and with carryovers was betting $40 he could beat us. He made this bet because he did not think I could find my ball and did not thiink anyone else could beat him. He was forced to back off his ball three times during his back swing because of this kid and his grandpa. I managed to get into the greenside grass bunker in two and had a good chance to get up and down when once again this kid distracted me during my swing. The other guy lost the hole, and $40 and was just about as pissed as I was.

 

I could go on but I shot a 42 on the back and 5 stokes over par can be directly attributed to this kid interfering with my swing. Now financially, it did not make much difference to me because one of the high handicappers had a career day and I would have had to break par and shoot a 2 under 70 to beat him. He shot an 82 and normally shoots in the 90's but it was frustrating. I won $19 on the wolf bet but he won $50 on the quota bet, so I had a net $9 gain.

 

Other than one comment I do not know if grandpa knew how upset we were. When I missed the putt one of the guys, the one who ended up winning the quota said, "Rick, you would not make it on the tour, you are too easily distracted." I said, "I would not make it on the tour for other reasons, but mainly, because I lack the talent, but I have never seen where they have little kids walk between the golfer and the f***ing hole during the putt." Grandpa did try to keep this kid under control but having him horsewhisper the kids name during your backswing is almost as bad. Luckily, the little darling heads back to Wisconsin next week.

 

However, a 78 is not bad for someone who can not hit the driver right now. New shaft comes tomorrow so hopefully I can get them next week. I did win $99 and lost $23 this weekend counting Friday and hit the fairway 1 time with the driver. Lots of three woods and irons off the tee.

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Today, we played 6 man Wolf. One of the guys actually brought his young, 8 yo, grand son with him. I will first say that I am all for bringing kids to the course. And I am all for kids spending time with their parents or grand parents. You see where this is going don't you? To further set the stage, today it was humid, temperature was 101* when we finished the round, and there was not a breath of wind at the time. So with 6 people in the group it was slow, plus factor in allowing this kid to hit, made for a slow round and it was hot.

 

It was not any hotter than I was playing. After nine holes, I was even par and up $20. On the 10th hole, I had a four foot birdie putt and just as I transitioned from my back swing to forward swing with my putter, this little darling walked into my line of vision, between me and the hole from behind me, and I missed the hole by a foot. The guys thought this was rather humorous. I did not. First off, because I look at the hole and not the ball, I have a wider field of perifial vision than most people. So everyone knows how pissed off I get when they start to move during my swing. I mean, come on, it is just a few seconds. I wait until every one is settle before I putt. And all I ask for is about 20 seconds still and quiet. I do the same for you.

 

On the next hole, I am still not quite over the putt but I get up when it is my turn, and as I am taking my back swing, the little darling walks into my field of vision again, and I hit it into the coolies where it bounces off a rock and I later find my ball but I am in knee high grass 420 yards from the hole. On the same hole, one of the guys, wolfed it and with carryovers was betting $40 he could beat us. He made this bet because he did not think I could find my ball and did not thiink anyone else could beat him. He was forced to back off his ball three times during his back swing because of this kid and his grandpa. I managed to get into the greenside grass bunker in two and had a good chance to get up and down when once again this kid distracted me during my swing. The other guy lost the hole, and $40 and was just about as pissed as I was.

 

I could go on but I shot a 42 on the back and 5 stokes over par can be directly attributed to this kid interfering with my swing. Now financially, it did not make much difference to me because one of the high handicappers had a career day and I would have had to break par and shoot a 2 under 70 to beat him. He shot an 82 and normally shoots in the 90's but it was frustrating. I won $19 on the wolf bet but he won $50 on the quota bet, so I had a net $9 gain.

 

Other than one comment I do not know if grandpa knew how upset we were. When I missed the putt one of the guys, the one who ended up winning the quota said, "Rick, you would not make it on the tour, you are too easily distracted." I said, "I would not make it on the tour for other reasons, but mainly, because I lack the talent, but I have never seen where they have little kids walk between the golfer and the f***ing hole during the putt." Grandpa did try to keep this kid under control but having him horsewhisper the kids name during your backswing is almost as bad. Luckily, the little darling heads back to Wisconsin next week.

 

However, a 78 is not bad for someone who can not hit the driver right now. New shaft comes tomorrow so hopefully I can get them next week. I did win $99 and lost $23 this weekend counting Friday and hit the fairway 1 time with the driver. Lots of three woods and irons off the tee.

 

I gotta jump in on this. It took my son (who is 8 1/2) a long time to stand still while someone is putting or swinging and show proper etiquette. He's great at it now, but I played many rounds where I had to take him to the side for a talk. So two things here: 1) Never ever play a game that matters for anything with a kid around. Those rounds should be fun with everyone making a point to show the kid the right etiquette. 2) The prefrontal cortex part of the brain doesn't fully develop until mid-teens, so it's very difficult for children to not think selfishly and the only way for them to learn is to do exactly what he did and have his grandpa tell him not to, and it takes many times to sink in.

 

Sorry, that's my rant. But back on topic, I think rev is spot on. Be courteous and assertive or you'll regret it later. The same should hold true with playing with kids, either politely say you prefer to not game or play separately so you can gamble.

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I gotta jump in on this. It took my son (who is 8 1/2) a long time to stand still while someone is putting or swinging and show proper etiquette. He's great at it now, but I played many rounds where I had to take him to the side for a talk. So two things here: 1) Never ever play a game that matters for anything with a kid around. Those rounds should be fun with everyone making a point to show the kid the right etiquette. 2) The prefrontal cortex part of the brain doesn't fully develop until mid-teens, so it's very difficult for children to not think selfishly and the only way for them to learn is to do exactly what he did and have his grandpa tell him not to, and it takes many times to sink in.

 

Sorry, that's my rant. But back on topic, I think rev is spot on. Be courteous and assertive or you'll regret it later. The same should hold true with playing with kids, either politely say you prefer to not game or play separately so you can gamble.

 

I have no issue with him bringing his grandson. He has brought him before and he played a few holes and then grandma came and got him and things were fine. As you said a kid that age has difficultly standing still that long. (EDIT: Adults seem to have a problem standing still when someone is putting.) He was just fine the first two holes, but in the middle of the round he got to where he was walking around and grandpa was not paying attention to him. By the end of the round he was running out of gas and was whinny. Four hours in 100* temperatures is forever for a kid from Wisconsin. It was so hot that even I did not play more that 18 holes. The club will be closed tomorrow for maintenance and I did not play more than 18. I came home and my wife asked what was wrong, I said it was too hot to play golf and she said Seriously?

 

The issue I have with this is that we have money on this game. Yeah, it is not serious money and there are times when I will play just to have fun and be prepared to forfeit the money for a good time. This is what he was wanting to do and that is fine, it is his choice. However, I was serious about this weekend. I wanted to play well, and 74 and 78 ain't bad, but I was trying to beat yesterdays score. I was about to go back under par on the back 9 and obviously Frank was serious about the $40 hole. Everyone else was serious also, and this kid was distracting, not just to me but to everyone, but grandpa.

 

Like I said, I have no issue with taking children out to the course. I am actually a huge fan of this, but it should not be done during a money game. Also, the child did not bother him, he simply ignored him. Which is why he was bother us.

 

Believe me, if I had a son or a daughter I would take them to the course everyday, however, it is much like taking my wife. A few holes a day is fine, 18 holes with a wife or a child can get to be too much. I would also take them IN ADDITION to regular competitive round. Not along with my competitive round.

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Like I said, I have no issue with taking children out to the course. I am actually a huge fan of this, but it should not be done during a money game. Also, the child did not bother him, he simply ignored him. Which is why he was bother us.

 

Believe me, if I had a son or a daughter I would take them to the course everyday, however, it is much like taking my wife. A few holes a day is fine, 18 holes with a wife or a child can get to be too much. I would also take them IN ADDITION to regular competitive round. Not along with my competitive round.

 

Yep, this was sort of my point, never ever play a money game with a child. Either grandpa should have waited for another group or all of you should have called off the gamble.

 

As for 18 holes with an 8 year old, I do it all the time, my son loves it, though in the 100+ degree days he usually is done by hole 16 and will just sit in the cart as I finish, sometimes jumping in to putt. It's great. That said I'd still never play a money game with him around because no child that age wants to be the side show to some competition.

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Only time That I sugar coat things and bite my tong is when dealing with my co-workers. I don't want a personal issue flaw into business, I don't let personal things get in the way but a lot of people do let personal non-business related things get in the way.

 

Putting on a false front to friends and family is a poor idea IMHO, if you can't be honest with friends and family then who in life can you feel 100% honest with? I always tell people if I am talking to you outside of my job it is because I like you, if I give you s*** it means i like you. You can tell when I don't like you when I avoid you and say nothing to you unless I have to.

 

I just try to be honest, I really try to be humble about things as much as possible, sometimes i can be blunt & honest it comes off like me being a know it all a$$hole, more or less I correct mistakes and if you don't get a honest unbiased opinion their is no way to correct the problem.

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Hi Wade!

 

An easy way for you to solve some of the problems without offending family is to simply start walking the course. I usually walk, but I will make a definite point of walking if I am playing with someone I don't know or don't want to be around. Even if you're in a different cart, when you're riding you are still spending alot more time together in a foursome than you do if you're walking. Your inlaws are going to be alot less likely to drive over and get your club than he is to just pull it out of your bag that is always strapped right next to his! And if he does, you'll know it!

 

So start walking, use the excuse that its time to shed a few pounds, or save a little money, or that you heard it would help you play better (it will do all three for you)!

 

As to the kid issue, I really cannot stand being paired with an ill behaved child for a round of golf and I think it is incredibly rude for someone to subject others to that. If the child isn't ready or able to behave on the course then play as a single or leave the child at home. Your friends might be polite, but they don't appreciate it and even though they'll tell you how great it is that you're spending time with your family they'll be wishing you were doing it somewhere else.

 

I play several rounds a year with my friend and his 10 year old son and its great. He has a growing interest in the game and he not only knows golf etiquette, he actually points it out when any of us screw up! He knows to wait for us to tee off and then makes his way to the junior tees and handles himself just fine. Another friend has a child that is to young to be there and I'd rather do yard work than subject myself to that.

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Hi Wade!

 

An easy way for you to solve some of the problems without offending family is to simply start walking the course. I usually walk, but I will make a definite point of walking if I am playing with someone I don't know or don't want to be around. Even if you're in a different cart, when you're riding you are still spending alot more time together in a foursome than you do if you're walking. Your inlaws are going to be alot less likely to drive over and get your club than he is to just pull it out of your bag that is always strapped right next to his! And if he does, you'll know it!

 

So start walking, use the excuse that its time to shed a few pounds, or save a little money, or that you heard it would help you play better (it will do all three for you)!

 

As to the kid issue, I really cannot stand being paired with an ill behaved child for a round of golf and I think it is incredibly rude for someone to subject others to that. If the child isn't ready or able to behave on the course then play as a single or leave the child at home. Your friends might be polite, but they don't appreciate it and even though they'll tell you how great it is that you're spending time with your family they'll be wishing you were doing it somewhere else.

 

I play several rounds a year with my friend and his 10 year old son and its great. He has a growing interest in the game and he not only knows golf etiquette, he actually points it out when any of us screw up! He knows to wait for us to tee off and then makes his way to the junior tees and handles himself just fine. Another friend has a child that is to young to be there and I'd rather do yard work than subject myself to that.

 

Two points:

 

1) You cannot expect a kid to go out their first time and learn the rules, it takes a long time for many kids. As long as the parent is explaining things to the kid, then you have to give them a break if you actually like the idea of kids playing golf. IMO there's also nothing wrong with you asking the kid nicely to not walk around when you're putting or swinging. This works incredibly well and having an outside party say this helps reinforce proper behavior.

 

2) IMO, adults are worse than kids in terms of etiquette. I've played with people who are proper during the adult's swing, but once we get to the junior tees, they yap away.

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Of course I don't expect a kid to go out and learn the rules the first time, I expect the parent to know to not bring them out "with the guys" until they are ready. Everyone makes mistakes with etiquette and I don't mind mistakes, but if it is repeated and is annoying and putting the group on edge and costing strokes and money, that isn't cool, kid or adult. With an adult, you expect to be able to say something and have the behavior change, a kid who isn't disciplined enough to take instruction isn't appropriate on the course, especially not in a situation where your playing partners aren't enjoying the child.

 

I think similar about adult beginners. If you can't get yourself around the golf course in a reasonable fashion, you don't have any business making a prime time tee time. No one wants to watch and wait for someone to hit 150 dribblers, pop ups and shanks.

 

I've gotten my wife and 11 year old daughter into golf (ok, so daughter is still a work in progress) and I was very conscientious about knowing when they should be on the course and teaching them etiquette. My wife found it all pretty intimidating at first and didn't want to play with others for worry that she would make a mistake. We started out playing in the evenings, then with good friends in a very social non-serious environment and then moved into couples leagues and prime tee times. My daughter can play in the evenings and afternoons and we usually only play 6-7 holes. She's really ok with etiquette but she doesn't hit the ball that well and doesn't have the interest for more than that.

 

And really, I am not that hard core about etiquette. I am far more concerned that a mistake I might make will effect someone else's game than I am worried that they might effect mine. But I've been around some kids that shouldn't be on the course, and it sucks. So this is my anonymous scolding of parents of young kids!

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Personally it all depends on the kid but some common sense is need. I have taken my 5 year old to the driving range and when he got tiered we left personally I could never see my son being able to be polite out on a true cource (I still want to take him to the local executive cource though). He can't sit thru a meal at a restaurant I could only imagine what it would be like for him to walk around a cource for 4 hr

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Of course I don't expect a kid to go out and learn the rules the first time, I expect the parent to know to not bring them out "with the guys" until they are ready. Everyone makes mistakes with etiquette and I don't mind mistakes, but if it is repeated and is annoying and putting the group on edge and costing strokes and money, that isn't cool, kid or adult. With an adult, you expect to be able to say something and have the behavior change, a kid who isn't disciplined enough to take instruction isn't appropriate on the course, especially not in a situation where your playing partners aren't enjoying the child.

 

I think similar about adult beginners. If you can't get yourself around the golf course in a reasonable fashion, you don't have any business making a prime time tee time. No one wants to watch and wait for someone to hit 150 dribblers, pop ups and shanks.

 

I've gotten my wife and 11 year old daughter into golf (ok, so daughter is still a work in progress) and I was very conscientious about knowing when they should be on the course and teaching them etiquette. My wife found it all pretty intimidating at first and didn't want to play with others for worry that she would make a mistake. We started out playing in the evenings, then with good friends in a very social non-serious environment and then moved into couples leagues and prime tee times. My daughter can play in the evenings and afternoons and we usually only play 6-7 holes. She's really ok with etiquette but she doesn't hit the ball that well and doesn't have the interest for more than that.

 

And really, I am not that hard core about etiquette. I am far more concerned that a mistake I might make will effect someone else's game than I am worried that they might effect mine. But I've been around some kids that shouldn't be on the course, and it sucks. So this is my anonymous scolding of parents of young kids!

 

Couldn't agree more that kids shouldn't play during prime time, my only point is the adults in the group need reasonable expectations. We typically go after 4pm to a course that has special rates for kids and kids tees, so there are plenty of other children out there. Don't get me wrong, if a kid does something they shouldn't and I see it, I point it out to them or their parent. One kid last weekend nearly picked up my son's ball until I called him out, after which I noticed the parent watching his child to make sure he didn't pick up someone else's ball.

 

I'd recommend getting your daughter lessons from a coach who is listed on the uskidsgolf.com webpage though, she'll enjoy it a lot more once she starts hitting the ball well. My son's first question on weekends is now "are we going golfing today?" He makes his share of pars now at age 8 and is really enjoying it.

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Yeah man, that's quite a bit different. If you're playing at a course that caters to parents and kids at certain times then I would argue that trying to have an adult game there and then is a bit ridiculous! That isn't quite the scenario as described by Wade though.

 

As to my daughter, she took lessons for 3 seasons. She seemed to really like it for a couple seasons, then lost quite a bit of interest and then said she didn't want to do it. She likes other sports, swimming in particular and tennis. I'm hopeful we can resume golf sometime but I don't want to push too hard and turn her off the game completely.

 

If we do it again I will definitely go the U.S. Kids route, wish I had the first time but don't know if it would have made any difference. One of the girls my daughter started with really loves the game and qualified for some national kids tournament at Pinehurst, my daughter never had whatever it is that this other girl had, she tolerated golf, she never loved it.

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My normal 3 guys one of them could care less if I'm screaming death metal in his backswing and dancing like a guy having a seizure. The other guy is pretty picky about me not moving or talking when he's swinging but doesn't really care where I'm standing so long as it's not right in his sight line. Sometimes in leagues I play with really picky guys who don't want to see me at all when swinging so I forget to move sometimes because I'm not always used to it. Ball marks, divots, bunkers. Always taken care of.

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