Mr. 82

Well, with Jarrod Lyle passing, and it being my brother's 58th birthday, and the first day of the PGA Championship and all eyes are on Tiger spraying every shot worse than a 20 capper, I'd say you picked a helluva day to celebrate this. But hey, are we talking beer, wine, scotch, Jack Daniels, or just a sleeve of golf balls as prizes? I mean, when it all comes down to it, the nitty gritty is how are we supposed to celebrate this from afar? I mean, should we post naked pictures of Alexandria Daddario, or that hot chick in the American flag bikini with big boobs who is supposed to be washing a car, and who are we fooling here, we didn't even notice the car in the video. Should we all get a free round of golf to celebrate, or send the mods certificate for free greens fees to Augusta National or something? Oh wait, if I was able to conjure up a certificate like that, do you seriously think I'd share it with any of you dweebs? Just promise me you'll keep your shoes off of the couch, and that the celebration won't get posted on The Smoking Gun, like this clown... http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/drunk/stuck-in-sand-trap-648923 Oh shoot, crap, that reminds me, I forgot to bail the kid out. He was in my foresome, and I promised him I'd be there to take care of it shortly. Dang it! Which one of you guys forgot to remind me!!! Crap, now his mother will be extremely pissed at me. Anyway, that reminds me to remind you guys - please, no matter how hard you celebrate today, don't get behind the wheel and do donuts on the golf course. You might get the car stuck in the sand trap, and trust me, the way some of you talk about how hard it is for you to get out of bunkers, you don't want to go there. Cheers mates! RIP Jarrod. Happy Birthday Bro! C'mon Tiger! Stop shanking it into the woods already!!!

OK, everytime I self condemn for having too many pair of golf shoes, I'm rereading this thread to feel good about myself. I'm currently wearing (to work almost every day) my pair of Asics golf shoes. Just in case I stop at the course on the way home for a quick practice session. They look like sneakers so no one even knows I am wearing golf shoes. You see boys, that's the key to all of this - wear them everywhere and figure out a way to incorporate them into everything you wear, everywhere you go. School, work, church, shopping, out to dinner, whatever. Always be prepared for any opportunity to hit the course without having to pause to change shoes at your car. You see, I'm so damn lazy and impatient, I can't afford those 2 minutes to switch shoes at my trunk in the course parking lot. In the car I have a pair of Footjoy Freestyle for my Saturday round. Because even though it's only Wednesday, you never know when you'll get kidnapped by gangsta hip hop golf rappers that might try and detain you indefinitely, and you might not have a chance to get home to get your gear before your Saturday round. You know, envision the movie, "The Hangover", and instead of Mike Tyson's tiger in the room, you have a couple of live roosters fighting each other and you have no idea how they got there, except that you need to get the heck out of here, because your tee time is in 45 minutes and thank God your golf shoes are in the car out back. Yesterday I wore my pair of Freddie Couples Ecco that literally you can wear anywhere. I went to Bible study first thing with them, then went home to work, then out to lunch with them on, and man oh man, I didn't have to stop to throw on golf shoes at 4:00 pm as I was quitting work, and headed to the golf course. I saved myself 60 seconds when I threw those babies on at 6:00 am. At home on the rack are my pair of Footjoy Greenjoys in black that are purely for winter golf. They are getting lonely, as I haven't worn them since May or so; at least since it's been hot enough to cause an explosion with my flatulence. We're talking sauna type hot weather, where even the aligators and any self respecting creature goes into hybernation until October, when football season is in full force and the temperature drops below 90 for the first time, and I'm as giddy as a 16 year old boy on prom night, because I know the golf course will be wide open on Saturday afternoon, because every other poser who plays golf whenever there is nothing better to do is not clogging up the local muni. And to round out our fabulous collection of five shoes is my Skechers Blades. I bought these at rock bottom golf on a massive sale. Well, I should just pause to say that any shoe in this collection was bought either on clearance or a massive sale. Because the GSwag doesn't pay full price for shoes or his balls. Well, let me rephrase - his GOLF balls. But the shoes are always bought on impulse because the price they are offering those bad babies for is so cheap that I can't afford NOT to buy them now. So screw the other four pair you currently have in your possession. You just never know when you'll need that pair of gray shoes with bright orange highlights. Hmmm...now to hit the clearance rack at Belk to find some clothes to match this hideous color combination.

Holy McJesus Batman!

nice shootin' Tex. [emoji6] Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

I played in a one day FSGA event today at the Golf Club of Amelia Island, which is private or only available to resort guests at the Ritz Carlton on property there. Just a side note, I looked at booking a room at the Ritz here and the cheapest basic hotel room I could find, overlooking the dumpster in the parking lot was $752. Rooms overlooking the Atlantic Ocean were well over $1,000 a night. Um yeah, sure, no problem. [emoji849][emoji857][emoji17] And for reference purposes, because I live 3 hours from here, I had to leave home at 4:30 am to allow myself enough time to get there and have time for a proper warm up. And speaking of warm up. Dude, it's 95 degrees with 90% humidity. But here we have DJ, Jr. from head to toe. What's with the pants?? 🤪[emoji23]. I stayed for the awards of this event. DJ, Jr was nowhere to be found. [emoji849] Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

This is my Tuesday night league right before we teed off here at Golden Eagle CC in Tallahassee. Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

no deer in FL you say? This is right off of the 2nd tee of Golden Eagle in Tallahassee a few Tuesday nights ago. Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

ok, I'll bite. What's a “P6”? Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

This example right here is why I've never had a lesson, and have basically self taught myself for the past 40 years or so, with limited advice and implementation of swing ideas. I'm scared as hell that I'll lose the ability to hit the ball well, and will end up wanting to quit the game because I hit it so bad. I mean, what is this guy's long term goal, PGA Tour? Ultimately that's what you would have to decide PRIOR to embarking on this mission. You decide a time frame for the lessons and the teacher before you give it up and go back to what you knew when. For me that would have been about after a month of playing like total crap. But this sort of thing just isn't an amateur thing. I've seen Martin Kaymer and Padraig Harrington try and remake their swings and their game to try and win the Masters, which meant they had to change their shot shape, both with absolutely horrible results. Kaymer has recovered fairly well, but Harrington absolutely fell off the planet trying to remake his golf swing into something he never had. I mean, the dude has 3 majors and it wasn't good enough? Shoot, keep what you have going, and keep winning Open Championships. So you never win the Masters. There are about 10,000 pros in the history of golf that are in that category. There are worse lots in life. Sent from my coral using MyGolfSpy mobile app

I don't know if I am allowed to pipe in here, but I bought the G700 SW and UW, mostly because I was looking to replace my current wedges which I was not happy with. I am extremely happy with both the look and feel of these clubs, as well as with the performance. The G700 wedges I have do what I want from a SW & UW, which are my 100 and 115 distance full shot clubs. In the few months I've been playing the G700 I've noticed an incredible accuracy with these wedges, when I make solid contact. I've also noticed an incredible amount of forgiveness on misshits too, as they go straight at the hole as well, with a slight bit off left or right. I've been playing PING for as long as I can remember, and the G700 are fantastic wedges for me. I will say that the hollow back creates a bit more distance, and also a different sound at impact, but the sound does not detract from the performance of the club. It's just different but I have the utmost confidence when pulling these clubs for a shot. They deliver time and time again without fail. Again, even my mishits fly close to the target, so these clubs really do perform.

Congratulations! Next stop, breaking 80!

velcro works too. Sent from my coral using MyGolfSpy mobile app

Well, your numbers are pretty good, even adding 2 or 3 more clubs for that distance. Let me tell you about my 83 year old Dad, who has every sort of physical ailment now that severely limits his golf game. By his own admission he hits his drives about 125, and then proceeds to play the average par 4 (from the senior tees) with at least two more full 3-woods, and then a wedge chip and then putting. Honestly it's painful to watch, because this is a man I never beat in straight up stroke play until he was 70 years old, and I am a 4 handicap now. My Dad just physically struggles to even walk to his ball from the cart, and now only plays 9 holes once a week. When I visited him a couple of weeks ago he admits the game is very tough for him and that he's had 3 doctors tell him to stop playing. But golf is his life, so that's like telling Harrison Ford or Clint Eastwood that they can't act anymore. The one thing I suggested to my Dad was to create his own tees on the course and maybe tee it up in the fairway, where he has a distance where he can actually reach par 4s in regulation, etc. But I think his pride won't allow him to do that. I'm actually thankful that me and my brothers were able to get together a year ago and play 18 holes with him. I took pictures at the end of the round and told my brothers I did so, because that might be the last time we ever play golf with him. My advice to you would be the same as to my Dad. Play a distance that allows you to reach par 4s with a mid iron in two and where you don't struggle to reach par 3s at all. Doesn't matter if you keep score, but just have fun and thank God for every opportunity you've been given to keep playing the game. I'll leave you with an experience from today's round with my regular foresome. One of the men I play with is probably in his mid-70's. Maybe older. Hard to tell. But he's severely obese and puts a handicap flag on his cart so he can drive the cart right up to his ball anywhere on the course. Today, we were on the 6th hole and this guy went to reach down for his ball while sitting in the cart and simply fell out of the cart and needed help in order to be able to get up and back in the cart. I suggested to my group that perhaps this guy needs to hang up his golf clubs permanently. So I'll just say that if you get to the point where you are falling out of the cart and can't get back up, that is when you know it's time to quit the game for good. Sent from my iPhone using MyGolfSpy

I maintain my GHIN handicap through a membership with the FSGA. I signed up online at the FSGA website, and then they give me the login information for the GHIN mobile app, where I post all my scores through. I don't technically have a home club through this mobile app posting, even though I am a member of the local public muni. But there is no peer review of my handicap, beyond discussing what I shot with the guys in my foresome. They don't question my score, beyond knowing that I shot that, and we never play in tournaments together, so peer review isn't really an option for me. I've used my GHIN recently in a FSGA one day event, but the folks at the FSGA are simply taking my handicap in GHIN on the honor system, trusting that what I post is legit. And ultimately, that's basically what it boils down to, my integrity. If I wanted to become a scratch golfer, I could do it tomorrow through GHIN. Or if I wanted to be a lying, cheating, stealing sandbagger, I could become a 20+ handicap tomorrow as well. I am in casual conversation right now with a few friends that are a member of a private club here in town, and I am seriously considering joining their club, where I would definitely be involved in all sorts of matches and weekly money games where my handicap would not only be used, but heavily scrutinized. But right now, I'm not ready to pull the trigger on this yet. Look, I'll be as transparent as I can be - is my handicap a legit 3.8 through my GHIN posting? Absolutely. But again, that's relying solely on my integrity and character to be honest about what I shoot. And I abide by the rules when playing, because if you cheat, your handicap will become invalid when you enter a tournament and really have to play by the rules 100%. But I honestly think that giving someone like me, who isn't a member of a private club, where there is no peer review for posting rounds of golf for your handicap, cheap and easy access to a handicap, really opens up Pandora's Box for sandbagging and glory handicaps coming at you left and right. It's always tempting to cheat the system if you know you can get away with it. Heck, we've got an entire city full of politicians in Washington, DC that should be all the evidence you need that power corrupts, and that absolute power corrupts absolutely.

I've never cracked a ball, but I cracked open an old driver on the range once about 15 years ago.

Stopped by a local course after work and just hit about 100 chip shots around the practice green. You know, it's a beautiful thing when you can just hit the short game practice area at the local course, and spend maybe 30 minutes after work just hitting chip shots from just off the putting surface to different pins. The best part about this sort of practice session is that it's quick enough not to interfere with your life, and it's totally free. When I showed up there, someone had hit all these range balls and left them on the green, so I just went around and sent them to a spot off the green, and commenced at chipping them towards one of the pins. Free and easy chipping practice, which in my opinion is the most important aspect of your game that you can never get good enough at. Such a deal! Sent from my coral using MyGolfSpy mobile app

I don't carry a 3 wood, because I was too inconsistent with it from the fairway. I switched to a 16.5 degree 4 wood, and tossed both the 3 and 5 wood from the bag. One fairway wood, splitting the difference in loft between the two made the most sense to me. Also, losing 2 fairways woods, and just having one, eliminates a lot of guesswork on those 210+ shots. Before I would get a number and pick between the 3 and 5 wood, not really sure which would be the best club for that shot/distance. With just the 4 wood, I don't even think about it now, and just grab it if the shot is over 210 yards. I can stroke that 4 wood pretty good off of the tee as well. It's sort of my go to club for shots I need to move around a corner, either cut or draw, whereas I am not confident enough with driver to pull off that shot with. Also, before when I had both the 3 and 5 wood, I RARELY hit the 5 wood. If I hit it once every other round it was surprising. And when you don't hit a club very often, the chances of you not hitting it well when you have to only increase exponentially.

Watching Feherty with Ian Poulter right now. I never cared for Michael (6 cups of caffeine all the time) Breed. He was just annoying to me. Sent from my coral using MyGolfSpy mobile app

Try having a conversation with your 90 yr old MIL... "Mom, what are you watching (on TV)?" Her to me, "What!!!???" "What are you watching on TV?" Her to me, "I don't remember." "What did you do today?" Her to me, "I don't remember." "Did you eat anything today?" Her to me, "I don't remember." There are days when she'll record a movie on TV, and she'll watch it 4 times in a row. Not because she really likes the movie, but when she finishes watching it, she doesn't remember that she watched it or even what it was. Dimentia sucks my friends. Totally sucks. You have a human being in the flesh that has no memory of anything, and is completely worthless for anything but breathing oxygen. Pfft, maybe I should have posted this in the rant thread. Sent from my coral using MyGolfSpy mobile app

not unless they are taking my order. Besides, I prefer brunettes with a brain. [emoji15] [emoji38] Sent from my coral using MyGolfSpy mobile app

Surprised they were even open for play. That looks totally unplayable.

Yeah, I was thinking the same thing. I have a Garmin GPS watch, and a non-slope laser, and with this bit of information it now has me seriously rethinking my distance tools.

Tiger Woods and three blondes walk out of a bar...

You know, all this talk about Tiger this and Tiger that has me thinking about this... Sorry for the interruption. Carry on with your Tiger worship.