Engaged detachment

[StrokerAce]

I'm always on the lookout of how I can apply concepts from other sports to my golf game and ran across this tweet:

Game 5 of the 1997 NBA Semifinals is known as the "Airball Game." Late in the game, Kobe Bryant shot not 1, not 2, not 3...but 4 airballs. His team lost 98-93 and was knocked out of the playoffs. He was asked about how he handled this humiliating season-ending performance...

After air-balling his team out of the 1997 playoffs, Kobe said he did 2 things.
First, he told himself, “Get over yourself. 'You feel embarrassed?' Get over yourself. 'You’re worried about how people may perceive you?' Get over yourself. You’re not that important.”
Second, he asked himself, “Why did those air balls happen?”
Kobe was then a Rookie, drafted straight out of high school. The year before, he played 35 games with plenty of rest time in between games. In the NBA, there are 82 games just in the regular season. So by the playoffs, Kobe said, “I didn’t have the legs. If you look at those shots—every shot was on line, but every shot was short.” It was clear what he needed to work on: “I gotta get stronger. I gotta train differently. The weight training program that I’m doing—I gotta tailor it for an 82-game season, so that when the playoffs come around, my legs are stronger and that ball gets there.”

My takeaway: The "world's greatest negotiator," Herbie Cohen, took the tactics and tricks he used in high-pressure situations and spun them into a general life philosophy. It's “a kind of Jewish Buddhism,” his son Rich writes in "The Adventures of Herbie Cohen." “He preaches Engaged Detachment, characterized as ‘caring, but not that much.’ More than a business strategy, he considers this a way of life.’” Engaged Detachment...

Kobe first detached—he told himself, "Get over yourself." But then he engaged—he put the work in to get stronger, to not airball his team out of the playoffs again. - - -

The legendary snowboarder Shaun White was asked about how he would mentally prepare for a high-pressure Olympic run. Before he dropped into the halfpipe, Shaun said: “I say, ‘who cares?’ At the end of the day, who cares? What’s the big deal? I’m here, I’m going to try my best, and who cares? I’m going to go on from this regardless of what happens. Even though my whole world is wrapped up in this…who cares?”

 

Great way to think of a round; get over yourself, nobody cares what score you shot, but afterwards engage with it and review it in your mind and ask yourself how you can do better.

 

 

[ejgaudette]

20 minutes ago, StrokerAce said:

I'm always on the lookout of how I can apply concepts from other sports to my golf game and ran across this tweet:

Game 5 of the 1997 NBA Semifinals is known as the "Airball Game." Late in the game, Kobe Bryant shot not 1, not 2, not 3...but 4 airballs. His team lost 98-93 and was knocked out of the playoffs. He was asked about how he handled this humiliating season-ending performance...

After air-balling his team out of the 1997 playoffs, Kobe said he did 2 things.
First, he told himself, “Get over yourself. 'You feel embarrassed?' Get over yourself. 'You’re worried about how people may perceive you?' Get over yourself. You’re not that important.”
Second, he asked himself, “Why did those air balls happen?”
Kobe was then a Rookie, drafted straight out of high school. The year before, he played 35 games with plenty of rest time in between games. In the NBA, there are 82 games just in the regular season. So by the playoffs, Kobe said, “I didn’t have the legs. If you look at those shots—every shot was on line, but every shot was short.” It was clear what he needed to work on: “I gotta get stronger. I gotta train differently. The weight training program that I’m doing—I gotta tailor it for an 82-game season, so that when the playoffs come around, my legs are stronger and that ball gets there.”

My takeaway: The "world's greatest negotiator," Herbie Cohen, took the tactics and tricks he used in high-pressure situations and spun them into a general life philosophy. It's “a kind of Jewish Buddhism,” his son Rich writes in "The Adventures of Herbie Cohen." “He preaches Engaged Detachment, characterized as ‘caring, but not that much.’ More than a business strategy, he considers this a way of life.’” Engaged Detachment...

Kobe first detached—he told himself, "Get over yourself." But then he engaged—he put the work in to get stronger, to not airball his team out of the playoffs again. - - -

The legendary snowboarder Shaun White was asked about how he would mentally prepare for a high-pressure Olympic run. Before he dropped into the halfpipe, Shaun said: “I say, ‘who cares?’ At the end of the day, who cares? What’s the big deal? I’m here, I’m going to try my best, and who cares? I’m going to go on from this regardless of what happens. Even though my whole world is wrapped up in this…who cares?”

 

Great way to think of a round; get over yourself, nobody cares what score you shot, but afterwards engage with it and review it in your mind and ask yourself how you can do better.

 

 

This is a great mentality to have, especially for golf, and amateur golf the most, you care about your game but no one else does generally. So who cares, hit a bad shot let it go, learn what you might need to practice on but otherwise there is nothing there. I would say that is really what it comes down to, learn from the mistakes then move on because who cares about that last shot. 

[StrokerAce]

2 minutes ago, ejgaudette said:

This is a great mentality to have, especially for golf, and amateur golf the most, you care about your game but no one else does generally. So who cares, hit a bad shot let it go, learn what you might need to practice on but otherwise there is nothing there. I would say that is really what it comes down to, learn from the mistakes then move on because who cares about that last shot. 

It took me a long time to realize, really really realize, that nobody cares how well or how poorly you play or what your score is. 

Once I got over that mental hurdle the game became easier.

[ejgaudette]

6 minutes ago, StrokerAce said:

It took me a long time to realize, really really realize, that nobody cares how well or how poorly you play or what your score is. 

Once I got over that mental hurdle the game became easier.

It is so true though, even the people you are playing with are so into their own game that you are lucky if they have a passing interest in what you are shooting.

[cksurfdude]

The mental game aspect of golf is really interesting to me - been reading about it, been listening to podcasts about it, subscribed to online courses about it .. even attended a two day clinic focused on it...

And "getting it" still eludes me (of course!).

But here's something interesting and, hopefully, useful to share...

Credit: Golf Science Lab / Cordie Walker

 

[edingc]

On 5/2/2023 at 3:34 PM, ejgaudette said:

So who cares, hit a bad shot let it go, learn what you might need to practice on but otherwise there is nothing there.

Obviously tougher to implement than say, but this is so true. 

I know there's a lot of advice saying to break rounds into smaller chunks mentally, but I find I play my best golf taking things simply one shot at a time. If I just strive to put the best swing on the ball that I can each time, I find I play my best. I don't do nearly as well if I let my previous shot, or even a few previous shots,  linger in my mind 

[Kenny B]

2 hours ago, cksurfdude said:

The mental game aspect of golf is really interesting to me - been reading about it, been listening to podcasts about it, subscribed to online courses about it .. even attended a two day clinic focused on it...

And "getting it" still eludes me (of course!).

But here's something interesting and, hopefully, useful to share...

Credit: Golf Science Lab / Cordie Walker

 

I’m very guilty of #1.  I KNOW that I can hit a particular shot.  I’ve done it before… I do it ALL the time.  However, there are times when I can’t for the life of me hit the shot.  And when I don’t, then doubt creeps in about whether I can hit it again… and wouldn’t you know it, I immediately have the shot again!!  

[ejgaudette]

10 hours ago, edingc said:

Obviously tougher to implement than say, but this is so true. 

I know there's a lot of advice saying to break rounds into smaller chunks mentally, but I find I play my best golf taking things simply one shot at a time. If I just strive to put the best swing on the ball that I can each time, I find I play my best. I don't do nearly as well if I let my previous shot, or even a few previous shots,  linger in my mind 

So true it is such a tough thing to execute but is invaluable if you can. I know I should get into some meditative practice to help get a little better at this.

[NateBevers3]

Thanks for sharing. This is so true, I barely remember what score I shot a week ago, I'm definitely not remembering what the people I played with shot 

All you can do is work on your own game, forget what other people think.

[cksurfdude]

On 5/10/2023 at 10:12 PM, Kenny B said:

I’m very guilty of #1.  I KNOW that I can hit a particular shot.  I’ve done it before… I do it ALL the time.  However, there are times when I can’t for the life of me hit the shot.  And when I don’t, then doubt creeps in about whether I can hit it again… and wouldn’t you know it, I immediately have the shot again!!  

Funny you mentioned that...

During that in-person clinic I'd attended after talking at the start of the first day about (haha) "performance anxiety", amongst other topics...

..one of the skills the coach had us try on the range was to "connect with the sound and feel of a good shot you've got with that club in your hand" .. with the idea not to pressure yourself into hitting another just was good shot but rather to get deeper into the process of executing the current shot (..if any of that psycho babble the way I wrote it makes any sense ).