Sad news

[Mr. 82]

So I spoke to my parents on Thanksgiving, and one thing that stood out as very sad from our conversation is that my parents have resigned their membership in their country club. My Dad specifically retired and joined this club not long after, and this is his way of essentially saying he can’t play golf anymore. My parents were paying like $700 a month for their club, and my Dad was limited to 9 holes once a week, on a good week. They were still eating there on Sundays, but my Mom mentioned that the food service had gone down, so they just couldn’t justify the expense any more.

 

This may not seem like a big deal to anyone who doesn’t know my Dad, but this was everything to him. I played golf with him back in July and it was painful for him to play and even walk, and I knew this day was probably coming but it’s still hard to hear. Another way of looking at this is that my Dad probably has given up playing golf and I fear he’ll get depressed and lose his will to live as his entire life has revolved around golf. I mean, that’s where I get my obsession with the game from.

 

Hopefully he’ll be ok as he finds other ways to occupy his time. I just might have to visit more often to make sure they’re doing ok.

 

 

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[perseveringgolfer]

sorry to hear that @GSwag. Without asking anything personal I assume it's not something that might improve for your dad mobility wise? I ask as my Dad did the same and at retiral we got him a dog which brought new motivation to him as another soul needed his attention and support. He started walking more and could then do an occasional 18 holes.

It's never easy but maybe driving range golf or simulator would fill a bit of that gap for him plus riding a buggy round with you sometimes.

 

[Mr. 82]

My Dad has a lot of pain in his feet and body. Everything hurts. So I don’t know if he’ll even play anymore. He’s already had 3 doctors tell him he needs to stop playing for physical reasons. He’s almost 84 and his body is just giving out on him.

I guess the good news in this is that he wasn’t playing much anymore anyway, so I don’t know how much things with change with him. Whatever happens I know he’ll try and figure out a way to get out of the house during the day, as being at home all day with my mother will probably drive him nuts, as my mother can be an emotional handful to say the least. Shall we say she is easily triggered to anger by the smallest things. Probably where I get some of that from.


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[deejaid]

That’s a shame to hear GSwag, but unfortunately, we are all gonna come to a point where our golfing journey ends. I can see how your parents wouldn’t want to spend $700 a month just for a place to eat, so that is definitely understandable as well.

My grandfather has hit a similar bumpy road. At 97 years old he was still playing multiple times a week even this past season. Now, he said his balance is getting bad so it is tougher to play. Then, a month ago, my uncle who lived with Grandpa, helping him with his day-to-day activities the most important being his #1 golfing buddy, passed away at 75. Grandpas golfing journey may be coming to an end as well.

I hope your dad can still keep in touch and visit with his golfing buddies off the course. Those are important friendships to keep strong, even if they don’t involve golf anymore.




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[Rickp]

My Dad has a lot of pain in his feet and body. Everything hurts. So I don’t know if he’ll even play anymore. He’s already had 3 doctors tell him he needs to stop playing for physical reasons. He’s almost 84 and his body is just giving out on him.

I guess the good news in this is that he wasn’t playing much anymore anyway, so I don’t know how much things with change with him. Whatever happens I know he’ll try and figure out a way to get out of the house during the day, as being at home all day with my mother will probably drive him nuts, as my mother can be an emotional handful to say the least. Shall we say she is easily triggered to anger by the smallest things. Probably where I get some of that from.


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Don’t know what to say except wish him and your family well. I hope (like my Dad did) is find a few of the “Old Timers” and meet for morning coffee somewhere. It did him a World of good.
Living in a Golf retirement Village I see this happening every week and it’s sad to say the least. Wish him good luck from me and all us on MGS and don’t let him stay home it sounds he enjoys the social and well as the game itself so get him out there.


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[GolfSpy_BNG]

That is terrible to hear GSWAG.  Hopefully your Dad will find something to fill the void that brings him as much joy as golf did.

[PlaidJacket]

Since he's a guy that loves golf but can't play anymore why not ask him to think about volunteering with The First Tee. Assuming he lives in Tallahassee or another town with a location or Chapter. They might have any number of things he could do from office work to working with the kids. You never know and it might be fun for him too.

[PMookie]

Man, that’s rough. Saying prayers for him that he’ll find other avenues. I dread the day....



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[tony@CIC]

That’s a shame to hear GSwag, but unfortunately, we are all gonna come to a point where our golfing journey ends. I can see how your parents wouldn’t want to spend $700 a month just for a place to eat, so that is definitely understandable as well.

My grandfather has hit a similar bumpy road. At 97 years old he was still playing multiple times a week even this past season. Now, he said his balance is getting bad so it is tougher to play. Then, a month ago, my uncle who lived with Grandpa, helping him with his day-to-day activities the most important being his #1 golfing buddy, passed away at 75. Grandpas golfing journey may be coming to an end as well.

I hope your dad can still keep in touch and visit with his golfing buddies off the course. Those are important friendships to keep strong, even if they don’t involve golf anymore.




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Sorry to hear about your uncle. But wow, your grandfather is still playing a few times a week at 97!!!!!!


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[deejaid]

Sorry to hear about your uncle. But wow, your grandfather is still playing a few times a week at 97!!!!!!


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Thanks Tony. Grandpa is an incredible guy. I learned the game hitting balls on his farm.

He never drank, never smoked, survived a mortar shell in France in 1944, came home and raised 6 kids and farmed in the morning and evening while working another job during the day.

I strive to be half the man he is.


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[revkev]

Sorry to hear this news GSwag. I pray your Dad finds a suitable outlet to replace golf


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[Kenny B]

That is sad news GSwag.  I hope he finds another pastime to occupy his mind.  I am not that far behind him, and I have aches and pains after every round I play.  I hope I can make it to 84.  I'm not sure what I would do; guess I had better spend some time contemplating.

[Mizuno_fan]

So I spoke to my parents on Thanksgiving, and one thing that stood out as very sad from our conversation is that my parents have resigned their membership in their country club. My Dad specifically retired and joined this club not long after, and this is his way of essentially saying he can’t play golf anymore. My parents were paying like $700 a month for their club, and my Dad was limited to 9 holes once a week, on a good week. They were still eating there on Sundays, but my Mom mentioned that the food service had gone down, so they just couldn’t justify the expense any more.
 
This may not seem like a big deal to anyone who doesn’t know my Dad, but this was everything to him. I played golf with him back in July and it was painful for him to play and even walk, and I knew this day was probably coming but it’s still hard to hear. Another way of looking at this is that my Dad probably has given up playing golf and I fear he’ll get depressed and lose his will to live as his entire life has revolved around golf. I mean, that’s where I get my obsession with the game from.
 
Hopefully he’ll be ok as he finds other ways to occupy his time. I just might have to visit more often to make sure they’re doing ok.
 
 
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What about getting him involved at a local range helping with a swing coach. Helping kids teaching them rules and etiquette. Something that is not very physical, but still keeping him in the game and his mind occupied with something he loves.


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[Mr. 82]

22 minutes ago, Mizuno_fan said:

What about getting him involved at a local range helping with a swing coach. Helping kids teaching them rules and etiquette. Something that is not very physical, but still keeping him in the game and his mind occupied with something he loves.


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Since I only see my parents maybe once a year it's hard for me to know exactly how they occupy their time.  I do know that at one time my parents were heavily involved with the college for seniors at UNC Asheville.  He may just get more involved with that, but I didn't ask.  I would imagine that with as little golf as he has played in the past year or so that this is merely a transition into just passing on the little golf that he played and now devoting more of his time to whatever it was he was doing already.

The weird thing about my Dad is that at one time he spent a ton of time making hickory clubs in his basement, but he hasn't done any of that in years.  Knowing my Dad though, he'll find ways to occupy his time.  He's not one who likes sitting around doing nothing, or just staring at the TV.

[fixyurdivot]

I often thought someone should start a chip and putt venue - the next level down from a small executive par 3 layout.  I knew a couple of guys in WA who, no longer able to play, would meet 1-2x/week at a local course, have breakfast, and then play a few putting rounds for money.  Listening too and watching them had me thinking they were having the most fun at the course.  

[kardboard.kid]

Sorry to hear. It's hard watching parents get older. I think we will have to take my dad's let's away. He got in the highway, some how and could figure out how to get back off. We didn't hear about it as he eventually realized where he was and drove home. Mom told us like a week later. Just do your best to show support.

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[Mr. 82]

I really hate being right. I got a call from my daughter on Friday, telling me that my Dad is in the hospital. Triple bypass heart surgery Monday and Tuesday. 94% and 90% blocked arteries. How stubborn is my old man in hating doctors? He started having chest pains last Monday and waited to go see a doctor until Friday. If he had waited any longer he probably would have had a heart attack. My Mom waits until Saturday afternoon to call me, as I have to get the news through my daughter. Talked to my Dad and he seems in good spirits, and joking about all the cute nurses taking care of him. Of course, the only question he asks about me is, "how's your golf game?"

Texted my sister and brothers, and with his 84th birthday three days before Christmas we all changed whatever plans we had to be there this year (parents are in Asheville, one brother in Cleveland, another in Colorado, sister in Chicago). My fear is that this will be his last birthday, but you never know. My grandmother had a heart attack in her 60's, and my grandfather drank himself to death shortly thereafter, so all things being considered he's on borrowed time. Then again, aren't we all, as tomorrow isn't promised to anyone.

If you read anything from this post, enjoy the time you have with your loved ones. You don't get many do overs in life, and once today is gone, you can't get it back. And I've never once seen a hurst pulling a UHaul with anyone's stuff, and no one ever wished they spent more time at work when they died.

[tony@CIC]

I really hate being right. I got a call from my daughter on Friday, telling me that my Dad is in the hospital. Triple bypass heart surgery Monday and Tuesday. 94% and 90% blocked arteries. How stubborn is my old man in hating doctors? He started having chest pains last Monday and waited to go see a doctor until Friday. If he had waited any longer he probably would have had a heart attack. My Mom waits until Saturday afternoon to call me, as I have to get the news through my daughter. Talked to my Dad and he seems in good spirits, and joking about all the cute nurses taking care of him. Of course, the only question he asks about me is, "how's your golf game?"

Texted my sister and brothers, and with his 84th birthday three days before Christmas we all changed whatever plans we had to be there this year (parents are in Asheville, one brother in Cleveland, another in Colorado, sister in Chicago). My fear is that this will be his last birthday, but you never know. My grandmother had a heart attack in her 60's, and my grandfather drank himself to death shortly thereafter, so all things being considered he's on borrowed time. Then again, aren't we all, as tomorrow isn't promised to anyone.

If you read anything from this post, enjoy the time you have with your loved ones. You don't get many do overs in life, and once today is gone, you can't get it back. And I've never once seen a hurst pulling a UHaul with anyone's stuff, and no one ever wished they spent more time at work when they died.

So sorry to hear about his heart issue. Let's hope for the best!




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[GB13]

2 hours ago, GSwag said:

I really hate being right. I got a call from my daughter on Friday, telling me that my Dad is in the hospital. Triple bypass heart surgery Monday and Tuesday. 94% and 90% blocked arteries. How stubborn is my old man in hating doctors? He started having chest pains last Monday and waited to go see a doctor until Friday. If he had waited any longer he probably would have had a heart attack. My Mom waits until Saturday afternoon to call me, as I have to get the news through my daughter. Talked to my Dad and he seems in good spirits, and joking about all the cute nurses taking care of him. Of course, the only question he asks about me is, "how's your golf game?"

Texted my sister and brothers, and with his 84th birthday three days before Christmas we all changed whatever plans we had to be there this year (parents are in Asheville, one brother in Cleveland, another in Colorado, sister in Chicago). My fear is that this will be his last birthday, but you never know. My grandmother had a heart attack in her 60's, and my grandfather drank himself to death shortly thereafter, so all things being considered he's on borrowed time. Then again, aren't we all, as tomorrow isn't promised to anyone.

If you read anything from this post, enjoy the time you have with your loved ones. You don't get many do overs in life, and once today is gone, you can't get it back. And I've never once seen a hurst pulling a UHaul with anyone's stuff, and no one ever wished they spent more time at work when they died.

I am sorry to hear this. My thoughts and prayers are with your family. I sincerely hope he pulls through. 

[kardboard.kid]

I really hate being right. I got a call from my daughter on Friday, telling me that my Dad is in the hospital. Triple bypass heart surgery Monday and Tuesday. 94% and 90% blocked arteries. How stubborn is my old man in hating doctors? He started having chest pains last Monday and waited to go see a doctor until Friday. If he had waited any longer he probably would have had a heart attack. My Mom waits until Saturday afternoon to call me, as I have to get the news through my daughter. Talked to my Dad and he seems in good spirits, and joking about all the cute nurses taking care of him. Of course, the only question he asks about me is, "how's your golf game?"

Texted my sister and brothers, and with his 84th birthday three days before Christmas we all changed whatever plans we had to be there this year (parents are in Asheville, one brother in Cleveland, another in Colorado, sister in Chicago). My fear is that this will be his last birthday, but you never know. My grandmother had a heart attack in her 60's, and my grandfather drank himself to death shortly thereafter, so all things being considered he's on borrowed time. Then again, aren't we all, as tomorrow isn't promised to anyone.

If you read anything from this post, enjoy the time you have with your loved ones. You don't get many do overs in life, and once today is gone, you can't get it back. And I've never once seen a hurst pulling a UHaul with anyone's stuff, and no one ever wished they spent more time at work when they died.

Prayers with you. Family is precious

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[GolfSpy_BNG]

I really hate being right. I got a call from my daughter on Friday, telling me that my Dad is in the hospital. Triple bypass heart surgery Monday and Tuesday. 94% and 90% blocked arteries. How stubborn is my old man in hating doctors? He started having chest pains last Monday and waited to go see a doctor until Friday. If he had waited any longer he probably would have had a heart attack. My Mom waits until Saturday afternoon to call me, as I have to get the news through my daughter. Talked to my Dad and he seems in good spirits, and joking about all the cute nurses taking care of him. Of course, the only question he asks about me is, "how's your golf game?"

Texted my sister and brothers, and with his 84th birthday three days before Christmas we all changed whatever plans we had to be there this year (parents are in Asheville, one brother in Cleveland, another in Colorado, sister in Chicago). My fear is that this will be his last birthday, but you never know. My grandmother had a heart attack in her 60's, and my grandfather drank himself to death shortly thereafter, so all things being considered he's on borrowed time. Then again, aren't we all, as tomorrow isn't promised to anyone.

If you read anything from this post, enjoy the time you have with your loved ones. You don't get many do overs in life, and once today is gone, you can't get it back. And I've never once seen a hurst pulling a UHaul with anyone's stuff, and no one ever wished they spent more time at work when they died.

So sorry to hear this. Your father and your entire family will be in my family’s prayers. Hoping he has a full and speedy recovery.


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[ga_pike]

Sorry brother...