How do you recover from a bad....

[EnderinAZ]

...Shot or series of shots. Or just being angry or frustrated on the course? I ask this a part of research for a writing project I am working on and to tie together some thought threads brought on by reading 

Whole Brain Living

The Anatomy of Choice and the Four Characters That Drive Our Life

Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor

 https://www.drjilltaylor.com/whole-brain-living/

Frustration and anger are very strong negative emotions that can grab a hold of your "golfing attitude" and sink deep disruptive roots into your ability to enjoy the game and play well.  Case in point: one of the guys I played with in this weeks Friday game had a stubbed shot on his very first fairway swing and he exploded with anger and frustration. His attitude before that swing was up beat and positive then instantly it was negative and corrosive.  It took 15 holes for him to put that anger away and play the last couple of holes well. 

When I asked him about it at first he didn't even acknowledge the fact he spent most of the day on the edge of club throwing anger. I pressed him a bit and he finally said he gave up on score and just wanted to finish the day and the best way to do that was to calm down and hit the ball. Then when I asked why he didn't do that calming thing as soon as he felt he was angry, he looked at me thoughtfully and said, "I don't think I can bleeping do that, but I don't think I have every tried." 

There are lots and lots of things that can frustrate you that you cannot control on the golf course. From slow play to the guy who wont get off his phone and play, to mud instead of grass, and a myriad of other uncontrollables that just eat on you as you play. Then there are the things that just make you mad. The cart you rented dies on the 8th hole as far from the clubhouse as you can get. Your 3 water ball in 4 holes. The group behind you who has hit into you for the 3rd hole and you have no way to speed up and move forward. 

So how do you get past frustration and anger and back to playing and having fun? Can you move past? I know a lot of guys who can't. When you move on does your golf game improve or just stay the same? When you move on have you set yourself in a "grinding " mode, or shifted to a laissez faire attitude that says the game is in the toilet but I am outside on the course and it is too nice out here to be upset over a golf game that means nothing. Or do you put your game in god's hands (or golf gods hands -your choice-) and trust he (they) will see you through to a happy ending?

My research says the attitude you are wearing as you step up to the ball has a huge impact on the type of swing your habit center puts into your body. So I am very curious.

 

 

[GolfSpy_APH]

I just do. Every shot is a new shot and truthfully even a bad day on the course is better than many others so I find it quite easy to move on for bad shots or situations!

[Josh Parker]

I do pretty well at forgetting the previous shot and focusing on the shot in front of me.  As often as I play, I have had days that it takes a few additional shots for me to take a deep breath and start fresh but never more than just a few.  

 

[Jim Shaw]

9 minutes ago, EnderinAZ said:

...Shot or series of shots. Or just being angry or frustrated on the course? I ask this a part of research for a writing project I am working on and to tie together some thought threads brought on by reading 

Whole Brain Living

The Anatomy of Choice and the Four Characters That Drive Our Life

Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor

 https://www.drjilltaylor.com/whole-brain-living/

Frustration and anger are very strong negative emotions that can grab a hold of your "golfing attitude" and sink deep disruptive roots into your ability to enjoy the game and play well.  Case in point: one of the guys I played with in this weeks Friday game had a stubbed shot on his very first fairway swing and he exploded with anger and frustration. His attitude before that swing was up beat and positive then instantly it was negative and corrosive.  It took 15 holes for him to put that anger away and play the last couple of holes well. 

When I asked him about it at first he didn't even acknowledge the fact he spent most of the day on the edge of club throwing anger. I pressed him a bit and he finally said he gave up on score and just wanted to finish the day and the best way to do that was to calm down and hit the ball. Then when I asked why he didn't do that calming thing as soon as he felt he was angry, he looked at me thoughtfully and said, "I don't think I can bleeping do that, but I don't think I have every tried." 

There are lots and lots of things that can frustrate you that you cannot control on the golf course. From slow play to the guy who wont get off his phone and play, to mud instead of grass, and a myriad of other uncontrollables that just eat on you as you play. Then there are the things that just make you mad. The cart you rented dies on the 8th hole as far from the clubhouse as you can get. Your 3 water ball in 4 holes. The group behind you who has hit into you for the 3rd hole and you have no way to speed up and move forward. 

So how do you get past frustration and anger and back to playing and having fun? Can you move past? I know a lot of guys who can't. When you move on does your golf game improve or just stay the same? When you move on have you set yourself in a "grinding " mode, or shifted to a laissez faire attitude that says the game is in the toilet but I am outside on the course and it is too nice out here to be upset over a golf game that means nothing. Or do you put your game in god's hands (or golf gods hands -your choice-) and trust he (they) will see you through to a happy ending?

My research says the attitude you are wearing as you step up to the ball has a huge impact on the type of swing your habit center puts into your body. So I am very curious.

 

 

this really encompasses the whole gamut of golfers and levels of golf. at my level we learn at an early age to "move on" after a shot that doesn't go as planned. Very rarely do I see super emotions from elite players, probably inert personality traits and training. One thing I will say that my sports psychologist helped me with was "post shot routine". Just part of the evolution on my game.

[jaskanski]

9 minutes ago, Josh Parker said:

I do pretty well at forgetting the previous shot and focusing on the shot in front of me.  As often as I play, I have had days that it takes a few additional shots for me to take a deep breath and start fresh but never more than just a few.  

 

This. You pretty much have to deal with the consequences of your last shot and make your next one count. Thinking about your last shot shouldn't have any bearing on the consequences of your next.

[TJ Hall]

1 bad shot…just focus on the next one and try to make the best of it, even pros hit bad shots and just work on minimizing the overall impact.

Bad series…just go back to basics and work on hitting a single shot with a go to club (7 iron for me).  Try to shorten the swing and hit almost a punch shot, usually works for me.

[Tom the Golf Nut]

A bad shot once hit is already in the past. If you can’t let it go, you’re only going to add stress and tension into your next shot. A sure recipe for another bad shot. You should focus on your recovery shot to put you in position for your next shot. Hero shots are for the pros. 
If you can let it go you will be much better off. Everyone hits a bad shot otherwise we all be on TV. I tend to chuckle and move on. It’s over and I’m focused on the next shot.

[Big moose]

First of all I am not good enough to mad, frustrated, yes like all of us. How can you shoot lights out one day and the next day you can't make a par to save your behind, it's golf. That's why we pay to play and not get payed. I play with a psychologist who is a scratch golfer and all he says if he hits a bad shot is that's interesting. I have never seen him carry that over to the next tee. So that's what I try to do, there is no way you are going to hit a good shot with that much anger inside. So lighten up and have fun. 

[silver & black]

I used to let bad shots and rounds piss me off. I was never a club thrower, or the guy that beat his club into the ground, but I did my share of swearing and generally making an ass of myself. I got tired of being out of control of my actions on the course. I had to take some time away from golf to re-evaluate why I played the game.... why I participated in something that pissed me off so much. After a couple of months away from the game, I came back to it with a different attitude. I'm not saying I still don't get a little aggravated at times, but I usually just chalk it up to 'I'm not a pro or near good enough to get mad' at something that I actually love to do.

When you think about it, any of us getting so angry over something that even the best in the game struggle with at times.... it's kind of humbling all on it's own. 

I just let myself be 'angry' for a few seconds... then move on like nothing happened. It isn't like you can change it anyway...lol.

Edited January 21 by silver & black

[cksurfdude]

3 hours ago, EnderinAZ said:

My research says the attitude you are wearing as you step up to the ball has a huge impact on the type of swing your habit center puts into your body. So I am very curious.

I try to keep a comment from Rory top of mind; something like...
"Don't let your golf influence your attitude, rather let your attitude influence your golf."
.. i.e. feel/act bad = play bad .. and vice-versa

Quite to similar to @silver & black's .. "I used to let bad shots and rounds piss me off. I was never a club thrower, or the guy that beat his club into the ground, but I did my share of swearing and generally making an ass of myself. I got tired of being out of control of my actions on the course." .. I didn't take time off from the game but I knew I really and honestly had to go to work on my mental game and mental approach to the game. Still a work in progress but am def much improved.

On course I try to separate the internal and the external - e.g. what I can control / what I cannot control.

As far as other golfers in my group having a bad day I've found that, for me, there are two kinds of effects on me - (a) people I don't know and likely won't get to know so I try to be teflon and let whatever their problem(s) is(are) just slide off of me; and (2) people I am invested in such as my wife or a long time friend can have a negative effect me... So I try to do the mindfulness thing and take a breath, try to imagine what their perspective may be and .. if it seems there's an opening for it .. try to offer some encouragement.

[EnderinAZ]

3 hours ago, GolfSpy_APH said:

I just do. Every shot is a new shot and truthfully even a bad day on the course is better than many others so I find it quite easy to move on for bad shots or situations!

Excellent. Do you find yourself looking forward to the next shot, regardless of where it lies, as an opportunity for "fun"?

3 hours ago, Josh Parker said:

I do pretty well at forgetting the previous shot and focusing on the shot in front of me.  As often as I play, I have had days that it takes a few additional shots for me to take a deep breath and start fresh but never more than just a few.  

 

Cortisol is the stress hormone that is released when your ball suddenly changes direction because it hit the guy-wire holding up the sapling the course just put in, and bounces into the pond. It takes 90 seconds for your brain to burn through that fight or flight hormone.

It is good that you can put it away.

When you do, are you in what I call a linear grinding mode? Or are you in a cautious, I need to be careful and safe mode?

3 hours ago, Jim Shaw said:

Very rarely do I see super emotions from elite players, probably inert personality traits and training. One thing I will say that my sports psychologist helped me with was "post shot routine". Just part of the evolution on my game.

I have never seen "elite players" except on TV, and those are so heavily censored and edited I will never see a mid level pro get upset. 

Post shot routine? Can you elaborate?

3 hours ago, jaskanski said:

This. You pretty much have to deal with the consequences of your last shot and make your next one count. Thinking about your last shot shouldn't have any bearing on the consequences of your next.

Exactly! Getting angry at a cart girl who is working the foursome in front of you for tips for 10 to 15 minutes every time she comes by is probably acceptable. Getting angry at a shot you have already hit is a waste of effort. 

2 hours ago, TJ Hall said:

1 bad shot…just focus on the next one and try to make the best of it, even pros hit bad shots and just work on minimizing the overall impact.

Bad series…just go back to basics and work on hitting a single shot with a go to club (7 iron for me).  Try to shorten the swing and hit almost a punch shot, usually works for me.

So you are able to stay in or pull yourself back into a grinding mode. That is head down, eyes forward, focused on the task at hand. looking to make good shots and do not really care about the score?

1 hour ago, Big moose said:

So lighten up and have fun. 

So do you? Are you able to move past that cortisol rush  from the shot that slices into jail in the trees. If so how? And, do you let ruminating over a bad shot leak into the preparation for the next shot?

1 hour ago, Tom the Golf Nut said:

I tend to chuckle and move on. It’s over and I’m focused on the next shot.

Okay your handicap says you are in a whole other realm of golf than the one I play in. With that in mind I would like to know what your attitude, state of mind, where you are mentally when you step up to your first hole tee box? Are you focused, business like, "okay I am going to get this done with minimal shots today"? Perhaps you are playful, looking forward to new opportunities to try new shots, new situations the golf course can present to you? A mixture of both?

[Josh Parker]

3 minutes ago, EnderinAZ said:

It is good that you can put it away.

When you do, are you in what I call a linear grinding mode? Or are you in a cautious, I need to be careful and safe mode?

 

I would say that it depends on the next shot that I am faced with and the approach/thought process that I need to use.

[Tom the Golf Nut]

3 minutes ago, EnderinAZ said:

Okay your handicap says you are in a whole other realm of golf than the one I play in. With that in mind I would like to know what your attitude, state of mind, where you are mentally when you step up to your first hole tee box? Are you focused, business like, "okay I am going to get this done with minimal shots today"? Perhaps you are playful, looking forward to new opportunities to try new shots, new situations the golf course can present to you? A mixture of both?

Interesting questions.

On the first tee or any other for that matter. I just pick a spot in the fairway I want to hit. I pick a spot in the tee box to give me the best angle. I line up the line on my ball with the spot I want to hit in the fairway. Take one practice swing, step up and hit. No swing thoughts, nothing else going on in my head.

I do decide if my round is for scoring or practice before I get on the tee box. For scoring it’s more business. Follow the procedure. For practice I will hit two balls and try to score the same with both balls. I will also play worst ball sometimes to challenge myself. This really helps you become creative and practice different shots. My goal is to try to score as close as possible to what I normally shoot.

[GolfSpy_APH]

25 minutes ago, EnderinAZ said:

Excellent. Do you find yourself looking forward to the next shot, regardless of where it lies, as an opportunity for "fun"?

Cortisol is the stress hormone that is released when your ball suddenly changes direction because it hit the guy-wire holding up the sapling the course just put in, and bounces into the pond. It takes 90 seconds for your brain to burn through that fight or flight hormone.

It is good that you can put it away.

When you do, are you in what I call a linear grinding mode? Or are you in a cautious, I need to be careful and safe mode?

I have never seen "elite players" except on TV, and those are so heavily censored and edited I will never see a mid level pro get upset. 

Post shot routine? Can you elaborate?

Exactly! Getting angry at a cart girl who is working the foursome in front of you for tips for 10 to 15 minutes every time she comes by is probably acceptable. Getting angry at a shot you have already hit is a waste of effort. 

So you are able to stay in or pull yourself back into a grinding mode. That is head down, eyes forward, focused on the task at hand. looking to make good shots and do not really care about the score?

So do you? Are you able to move past that cortisol rush  from the shot that slices into jail in the trees. If so how? And, do you let ruminating over a bad shot leak into the preparation for the next shot?

Okay your handicap says you are in a whole other realm of golf than the one I play in. With that in mind I would like to know what your attitude, state of mind, where you are mentally when you step up to your first hole tee box? Are you focused, business like, "okay I am going to get this done with minimal shots today"? Perhaps you are playful, looking forward to new opportunities to try new shots, new situations the golf course can present to you? A mixture of both?

There is of course moments of disappointment, but every opportunity is an opportunity for a new great shot or putt. 

[downlowkey]

I carry all poor shots to the grave where they will presumably be judged as evidence of some intractable moral failing that results in my eternal damnation.

[Javs]

If I hit a bad shot do I get angry, yes. Do I show it sometimes. I never throw a club. Just usually a few choice words for myself. Helps me move on. I don’t like keeping it bottled up. However, I have learned to accept the result and move on. I do not worry about consequences before the shot. Especially since your golfing brain doesn’t understand no. If you think ok don’t go left. Guess what the last thing your brain heard was go left… I evaluate each shot and pick target then the shape of shot. Immediately, I put my glove on and this starts the preshot routine. I see it and step in and hit it. Accept the result move on. You can learn from the past, but you can’t change it. The only thing you control is the next shot. 

Edited January 22 by Javs

[unccross]

I do a lot better at putting it behind me and just focusing on the next shot now than I did years ago. As bad as I am I expect to hit bad shots, so  it doesn’t really get me down. 

[cnosil]

I've never really got angry when I have hit poor shots or had a bad sequences of holes nor have I even thrown a club.  The older I have gotten and  the more I have learned about the game has just taught me that it just doesn't matter that much and everyone has bad shots and holes.  Yes,  I get disappointed when I am not playing well but I just work on getting myself back into playing golf the way I know I can.   My game is driven by stock shots so I just try to hit the same shot I have hit lots of times before.   

As others have also said,  I don't play this game for a living or to support my family so there is no reason to get that upset when I am playing poorly.  This all applies to casual and league play.  

[Jim Shaw]

1 hour ago, EnderinAZ said:

Excellent. Do you find yourself looking forward to the next shot, regardless of where it lies, as an opportunity for "fun"?

Cortisol is the stress hormone that is released when your ball suddenly changes direction because it hit the guy-wire holding up the sapling the course just put in, and bounces into the pond. It takes 90 seconds for your brain to burn through that fight or flight hormone.

It is good that you can put it away.

When you do, are you in what I call a linear grinding mode? Or are you in a cautious, I need to be careful and safe mode?

I have never seen "elite players" except on TV, and those are so heavily censored and edited I will never see a mid level pro get upset. 

Post shot routine? Can you elaborate?

Exactly! Getting angry at a cart girl who is working the foursome in front of you for tips for 10 to 15 minutes every time she comes by is probably acceptable. Getting angry at a shot you have already hit is a waste of effort. 

So you are able to stay in or pull yourself back into a grinding mode. That is head down, eyes forward, focused on the task at hand. looking to make good shots and do not really care about the score?

So do you? Are you able to move past that cortisol rush  from the shot that slices into jail in the trees. If so how? And, do you let ruminating over a bad shot leak into the preparation for the next shot?

Okay your handicap says you are in a whole other realm of golf than the one I play in. With that in mind I would like to know what your attitude, state of mind, where you are mentally when you step up to your first hole tee box? Are you focused, business like, "okay I am going to get this done with minimal shots today"? Perhaps you are playful, looking forward to new opportunities to try new shots, new situations the golf course can present to you? A mixture of both?

Post shot routine is a planned response to the shot you just hit. Example, 80 yd shot to a pin that is just to over a ridge in the green. I assess the shot in front of me, determine the conditions ie. uphill, downhill, side hill, wind, flat etc, I always stand behind the shot, pick a spot 6-8 inches in front of the ball, get set and commit to the shot. 
post shot I do a critique of the process and move on. 
every shot except putting. 

[cnosil]

4 minutes ago, Jim Shaw said:

post shot I do a critique of the process and move on. 
every shot except putting. 

A little thread jacking here,  but why no post shot critique of a putt?  I try to assess if I hit the putt like I envisioned,  if it started on my intended line, had the speed I predicted, where on the face I hit the putt, etc.  Just like the full swing need to understand and determine if adjustments need to be made especially as conditions change.  

 

[Jim Shaw]

30 minutes ago, cnosil said:

A little thread jacking here,  but why no post shot critique of a putt?  I try to assess if I hit the putt like I envisioned,  if it started on my intended line, had the speed I predicted, where on the face I hit the putt, etc.  Just like the full swing need to understand and determine if adjustments need to be made especially as conditions change.  

 

good question @cnosil, for me 90% of all the work on my putt is done pre stroke, over the years (and scar tissue) I am not too hard on myself on putts that don't drop. A different mental focus for me on putting, don't tell @chisagbut putting is mostly feel for me so post stroke or post shot routine is not as relative. Pre shot and post shot routines are imperative and part of my routine.

30 minutes ago, cnosil said:

A little thread jacking here,  but why no post shot critique of a putt?  I try to assess if I hit the putt like I envisioned,  if it started on my intended line, had the speed I predicted, where on the face I hit the putt, etc.  Just like the full swing need to understand and determine if adjustments need to be made especially as conditions change.  

 

 

[Josh Parker]

14 minutes ago, Jim Shaw said:

good question @cnosil, for me 90% of all the work on my putt is done pre stroke, over the years (and scar tissue) I am not too hard on myself on putts that don't drop. A different mental focus for me on putting, don't tell @chisagbut putting is mostly feel for me so post stroke or post shot routine is not as relative. Pre shot and post shot routines are imperative and part of my routine.

 

I am very much a feel putter as well. I see my line and trust it. 

I will think about my misses and at times putt again to get position and hands correct.

[Fore67]

I've played for 54 years and never considered a post-shot routine! I do review my play and have definitely zoned in on what I did and didn't do on specific shots. I have a few errors that rear their ugly heads every now and again (decelerate on some short chip shots) (mis-position the ball in my stance on some shots under 100 yards, hitting them fat) but I know that I don't have to review those, they are more of a pre-shot routine miss than a need for post review.

I may consider this going forward.

I was a bit out of rhythm a week ago. I was lucky enough to watch the pros warm up at the Amex in LaQuinta and got a first hand look at how not rushed these pros are. Everything was tempo and control. I took that back to my games on Friday and Saturday and struck the ball so much better than the previous week. That was as good a review as I could have undertaken.

Cheers,

Mike

[TJ Hall]

2 hours ago, EnderinAZ said:

So you are able to stay in or pull yourself back into a grinding mode. That is head down, eyes forward, focused on the task at hand. looking to make good shots and do not really care about the score?

While I think score can be important, it is not everything…I have played many rounds where I hit the ball well and can’t score, and other days where Incant hit the ball to save my life.  The score doesn’t tell the entire story.

With a bad shot, it is done, can’t do anything about it now.  If I’m still focused on the poor shot, it is not going to help me execute the next shot.

[Jim Shaw]

16 minutes ago, Josh Parker said:

I am very much a feel putter as well. I see my line and trust it. 

I will think about my misses and at times putt again to get position and hands correct.

that is an interesting comment about putting again, I have seen players (in a social game) putt again and I have oftened wondered why they do it, by position do you mean alignment? and the hands correct make sense... 

[Josh Parker]

5 minutes ago, Jim Shaw said:

that is an interesting comment about putting again, I have seen players (in a social game) putt again and I have oftened wondered why they do it, by position do you mean alignment? and the hands correct make sense... 

Not so much alignment because if I miss, I miss.  I may take a step back and look at what I read vs what the ball actually did so that I can learn from my read/feel.

The position part is more of making sure my set up is correct.  Ball placement with feet.  Putter distance, etc.  I can feel when I miss hit a putt and for me, it's more about making sure the next time I go to make a putt that I have that drilled in.  

I guess the best way to describe it is, after a pro makes a bad shot, you often see them practice the swing before moving down the course.  

[Javs]

3 minutes ago, Josh Parker said:

Not so much alignment because if I miss, I miss.  I may take a step back and look at what I read vs what the ball actually did so that I can learn from my read/feel.

The position part is more of making sure my set up is correct.  Ball placement with feet.  Putter distance, etc.  I can feel when I miss hit a putt and for me, it's more about making sure the next time I go to make a putt that I have that drilled in.  

I guess the best way to describe it is, after a pro makes a bad shot, you often see them practice the swing before moving down the course.  

I will throw this out there: sometimes a good putt doesn’t go in. Meaning you can hit the line have great speed and an imperfection in the green, a raised or overgrown cup can make the ball miss. Sometimes the grounds crew have guys set pins that don’t set the cup correctly. Over the course of the day this can create a soccer field effect. Where the cup is slightly higher and can create slight slopes on each side of the cup. Also if they don’t set new cups often then the hole can become overgrown. 

[Josh Parker]

16 minutes ago, Javs said:

I will throw this out there: sometimes a good putt doesn’t go in. Meaning you can hit the line have great speed and an imperfection in the green, a raised or overgrown cup can make the ball miss. Sometimes the grounds crew have guys set pins that don’t set the cup correctly. Over the course of the day this can create a soccer field effect. Where the cup is slightly higher and can create slight slopes on each side of the cup. Also if they don’t set new cups often then the hole can become overgrown. 

100%  if I make a good putt and miss, I finished the hole and move on to the next.

I do this routine when I feel like I missed by my own fault. Something didn't feel right in the putt.  

[HeathS16]

I treat it the same as a bad plate appearance from when I was still playing ball, quick analysis then let it go.  It is easy to get caught up in the frustration of not executing but I have forced myself into the habit of watching the ENTIRE shot until it hits the ground. Then analyze the steps I took when executing the shot. I will then rehearse the feel of a "good" shot and then let it go. I golf to have fun a recharge, not be mentally and emotionally exhausted by the time I leave. 

[cnosil]

11 hours ago, Jim Shaw said:

But putting is mostly feel for me so post stroke or post shot routine is not as relative.

You have commented in the past that you want to improve your putting so that confuses me more .    You don’t pick a line or speed based on feel?   if you hit say 3 putts short or very long you don’t make any adjustments?   IF you go strictly based on feel,  does that mean you don’t need any kind of warmup because your feels are always dialed in?  Or do you need to calibrate those feels which is actually more on the mechanical side?  Which goes back to why no post putt assessment to ensue the feels are correct?     How is this any different than a full/partialswing?  Or are you mechanical on those?