Joke thread

[tony@CIC]

So we have a rant thread and a pet peeve thread how about a joke thread - doesn't have to be golf related.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using MyGolfSpy

[DawgDaddy]

https://forum.mygolfspy.com/topic/14832-whats-your-best-joke/?hl=joke

 

[Golfspy_CG2]

I'm warning you all now.  Get ready for Wahoo's post count to jump exponentially!! 

[Golfspy_CG2]

I have to admit, this one was great...It sounds like one TheWahoo would have told, but I give him permission to add it to his libary!!

 

 

 

 

My last golf outing....ever....

 

While golfing, I took a quick turn to avoid hitting a chuck hole, and accidentally overturned my golf cart.

A very beautiful and attractive golfer, who lived right there on the edge of the golf course, heard the noise, came running out of her villa and shouted, "Are you okay?"

As I looked up I noticed she was wearing only a silky see through bath robe which was partially open, revealing what appeared to be a VERY nice figure

"I'm okay I think," I replied as I pulled myself out from under the twisted cart.

She said, " Please follow me to my villa so I can clean and bandage that nasty scrape on your head, then you can rest a while, and I'll help you upright the cart later."

"That's mighty nice of you," I answered, but I don't think my wife will like me doing that!

"Oh, come on now," she insisted. " We need to see if you have any more scrapes and treat them if so". Well, after all, she was really pretty, and very, very persuasive.

Being sort of shaken and weak, I finally agreed, but repeated, "I'm sure my wife won't like this."

We walked to her place just a 100 yards away, and after a couple of Scotch and waters and the bandaging, I thanked her and said,
"I feel a lot better now, but I know my wife is going to be really upset, so I'd better go now."

"Don't be silly!" she said with a smile, letting her robe fall even more open. "Stay for a while. She won't know anything, and by the way, where is she?"

I replied, "Still under the cart, I guess.

 

[TheWahoo]

Carolina:  Thanks, I will surely be repeating that one!

 

There's a knock on his door and a guy answers it only to see the local sheriff.   The sheriff asks do happen to have a picture of your wife.  While the guy does not know why, he never the less finds a picture and gives it to the sheriff.   Looking at the picture, the sheriff says:  I'm sorry sir, but it appears that your wife was hit by a truck.  To which the guy replies; yes, but she sure can cook.

 

A guy is playing golf with his wife and didn't see her on the ladies tee, so he hits his tee shot.   Unfortunately, the ball hits her on the temple and she dies.   The next day the coroner calls to say that there was a problem verifying the cause of her death.  The guy says, I thought you were calling it blunt force trauma.   Yes, but then we found a Titleist up her butt.    The guy explained--that must have been my mulligan. 

[Golfspy_CG2]

Carolina:  Thanks, I will surely be repeating that one!

 

There's a knock on his door and a guy answers it only to see the local sheriff.   The sheriff asks do happen to have a picture of your wife.  While the guy does not know why, he never the less finds a picture and gives it to the sheriff.   Looking at the picture, the sheriff says:  I'm sorry sir, but it appears that your wife was hit by a truck.  To which the guy replies; yes, but she sure can cook.

LMAO!!   

[ole gray]