Anxiety

[AH1980MN]

This has been coming for some time now. I am told this is natural. I have found that my circle has been diminished. I tend to shy away from traveling any distance. I have seen lately that I cannot go to Duluth, a place both I and my Ashley love dearly. I used to get in the car and drive to clear my head, now I stay at home. I rarely listen to music anymore. Does anyone have any insight on this?

[AH1980MN]

I apologize for taking up your time.

[Golfspy_CG2]

Anxiety and depression (not diagnossing you, just passing on some personal thoughts based on exoeroence) are both very common and niether should be left untreated (again my personal opinion) I would speak to your Dr. About these thoughts.

 

And your not wasting anyone's time. It's an important issue.

 

Wishing you the best.

 

 

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[ole gray]

This has been coming for some time now. I am told this is natural. I have found that my circle has been diminished. I tend to shy away from traveling any distance. I have seen lately that I cannot go to Duluth, a place both I and my Ashley love dearly. I used to get in the car and drive to clear my head, now I stay at home. I rarely listen to music anymore. Does anyone have any insight on this?

Yea I know first hand about anxiety. Anxiety along with PTSD is an emotional roller coaster. I take meds for it however I feel the best right after my time at the gym. Works wonders for anxiety!

 

 

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[AH1980MN]

Thank you cg2 and thank you OG. I have been dealing with this for some time PTSD is certainly a factor. Yous twos have been very helpful, whether you know it or not.

[Camcmart]

I think a great start might even be finding some support groups near you even before you go to the doctor. Anxiety is a troubling disorder that affects millions of people that can't always be treated with medications.

 

Support groups, therapy, and potentially medications are great treatment options.

 

 

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[AH1980MN]

I sort of want to have this thread here so that gentlemen can speak of this.

[AH1980MN]

Not to take away from you, CamCart.

[revkev]

This has been coming for some time now. I am told this is natural. I have found that my circle has been diminished. I tend to shy away from traveling any distance. I have seen lately that I cannot go to Duluth, a place both I and my Ashley love dearly. I used to get in the car and drive to clear my head, now I stay at home. I rarely listen to music anymore. Does anyone have any insight on this?

PM me if you'd like and don't apologize. You aren't alone and there is help.

 

Seriously

 

 

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[AH1980MN]

The thing is that it's unexplainable. Even to me me.

[Peaksy68]

The thing is that it's unexplainable. Even to me me.

Talking about things is great first step, lots of good suggestions here.

 

Easy for me to say, but the unexplainable randomness is a symptom of anxiety, so recognising it is great, gives you awareness of what's going on(at least partially) At least if you know it's anxiety you have a chance to do something about it.

 

Hope things get better for you soon

 

 

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[gaussman1]

I went through a similar spell years ago. It was after my second child was born. Full blown panic attacks out of nowhere, chest pains, heart palpitations, flushing, dizziness, the whole gamut. Was getting to where I was afraid to drive because "what if something happens?"

After ruling out all the physical symptoms my GP put me on a low dose of Lexapro and told me to come back a month later. When I saw him again I was feeling better and hadn't had an episode for a while. That's when he diagnosed panic attacks and a bout of generalized anxiety disorder. Said it was very common, particularly in high stress situations or when undergoing big life changes (new baby checked that box). That fight or flight response gets triggered in innocuous and nonthreatening situations and all of a sudden you have a bunch of adrenaline and cortisol being dumped into your system to deal with. I think the Lexapro helped with the physical symptoms somewhat but more than anything once I knew what was going on and that I wasn't in any danger they just stopped happening. I will still get one peeking around the edges every so often but since I now recognize it for what it is I can remain relatively calm and just let the physical symptoms wear themselves out. The mantra is sort of "I feel uncomfortable because this is happening but it's ok to feel this and I'm not in any danger. It will run its course in a few minutes if I just let it do its thing".

This might not be what's happening to you at all, but it sounded similar enough to share my experience. Realizing that I was ok was the largest hurdle for me.

[tommc23]

I've seen anxiety as part of my job for years sometimes it happens for no reason and sometimes its something that the person does without thinking about it. There are medications that help since things are getting progressively worse that may be something to look at. Definitely seek help I've seen it debilitate people.

 

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[bens197]

PM me. I will be glad to listen to you and offer any help.

 

Mental fatigue and stress deserves the same respect as any physical or outward ailment that would require a sick day.

 

I have been struggling with this since December 2016. Long story short, it was the significance of two traumatic events that broke the proverbial straw. A suicide by a friend that we never saw coming. The second was a pediatric trauma that sent me over the edge. The job exposes me to these events and after 10 years as a firefighter it finally caught me.

 

The next month my wife was pregnant with our first child, I was irritable and short. I became secluded and gained ten pounds. Every interaction was combative and I was not a fun person to be around.

 

My wife is an incredible woman, she called me out and asked me what she needed to do to help. It helped me preserve myself and begin the path to recovery. I attended classes on assisting individuals and groups in crisis. Became a member of our Departments peer support team. Sat down and assisted a grieving crew of Firefighters who were struggling with a recent bad call.

 

I accepted that there were things that will affect me and that it is ok to say I am not ok.

 

I wish you the best and appreciate your willingness to seek assistance.

 

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[perseveringgolfer]

Anxiety can be quite debilitating but you have taken the correct first step, talking about it.

 

Good advice above about talking with your Dr and exercise, even a good brisk walk does help.

 

I wish you well and hope things improve for you. 

[BigtazzGolf]

Agree with all said here.

Just know you aren't alone. Look up and you'll always find someone to talk to about your day.

Stay strong and keep it in the short grass.

 

 

 

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[MDGolfHacker]

Be glad to listen so PM and we can chat. As others have said, talk to your doctor and see what he/she recommends. Meanwhile, get out and golf to relieve the stress or do some yoga/exercise to do the same. Maybe a vacation is in order. That will do wonders too.

 

MDGolfHacker

[Kor.A.Door]

My Daughter is 17 and really struggles with anxiety. She has been seeing a counselor to help talk through some of the issues, it's okay to talk about it, it's okay to seek help for it. Anxiety can be very difficult for others to understand, I know with my daughter I struggle to understand a lot of the issues that she feels, and I have a really hard time understanding. We butt heads a lot on some things. Reach out to a counselor, or Dr. of some kind, you are not alone with anxiety, although sometimes you feel like you are.

[Jmikecpa]

I have struggled with anxiety my entire life or at least as long as I can remember.  About 10 years ago it got so bad that I blacked out and fell in the shower which led to a nice ride in an ambulance for some tests.  At that point I realized that the way that I was feeling was just not the norm and got help.  Short term was some medication to help me cope but long term was finding someone that I could talk to once a week to change my outlook on life.  I was able to get off the meds after about a year and still have someone that I can talk to when I need it.  The struggle with mental health is real and there is no shame in asking for help or admitting that you have some struggles.  Not sure that I would still be here today if I didn't get help and glad that I did before it was too late.

[dhartmann34]

My wife has battled anxiety, depression and a bit of PTSD for quite a long time....but the past 2 years have been extreme, intense, disheartening, draining and absolutely chaotic. 

 

But they've also been hopeful, eye opening and educational in a problem that people try to sweep under the rug and hide. She has received extensive treatment at a facility and continues therapy sessions and group meetings as she transitions back to 'normal' life..... although it'll certainly never be 'normal'. It's a lot of time, effort and hard work to be able to live with it and be healthy. 

 

But thankfully, while sometimes hard to find, there are facilities, programs and people out there that can help more than one would ever think possible. 

 

Mental health is an underlying health issue for the masses. And while it's not focused on like cancer or diabetes, it's up there in terms of how many people it affects.... but is often hidden so well until it's too late....or until a blow up occurs. 

 

Don't be afraid to lean on friends, family, doctors or anyone else to ask for help. Everyone deserves to be happy and healthy. 

[Rickp]

My wife also has anxiety problems. It's not easy as all previous guys have posted. I can't be gone away from her for extended periods. She does get some help and she volunteers a lot and that seems to help. Don't be afraid to get help and discuss, it helps.

Good luck man. We're here to help and do understand.

 

 

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[AH1980MN]

I wanted to give an update, and to say thank yous to everyone for offering me your thoughts and your stories. I wanted to give it some time for my path to unfurl a bit, so I apologise for letting the thread run dry there. I made an appointment with my doctor, and after some discussion, we decided to send me to a therapist, as I was leaning away from medication (my sister has been heavily medicated for ~20years and I am a bit nervous about what I've seen) but we later decided, with input from my therapist that a PRN was in order. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's a pill I can take if "the big one" hits- I have it in a "just in case" capacity, and have not had to go there yet, but having it around has given me some comfort.

 

My therapist and I have focused on more of the underlying reasons for my situation- a better job, better interaction with the world, thinking about what I can do to be a better boyfriend to Ashley (she's a peach and doesn't deserve to have to have to deal with this), and positive life choices.

 

I have joined a gym- I didn't realize I needed to- I'm on my feet 8 hours a day at work, plus life- I went through a lot of physical therapy for a back injury last year and had to take almost a year off of golfing, and I noticed a marked decline in my swing speed, so I've now hooked up with a personal trainer who played college golf to help target my workouts. I definitely notice an increase in my functionality since starting at the gym.

 

I have learned alot about myself through this process- a main thing is that it's just beginning and will likely never end- but that that's o.k. I have learned that there are many potential causes for what's happened to me, including (apparently) a significant amount of head trauma, more than one abusive relationship, isolation (self-imposed, possibly because of stated abuse) and lack of ability to get over this. I have had to face these head on, and I don't want to. I have never shied away from a fight, and I don't expect to, but this is one thing I didn't prepare myself to deal with- I look forward to your continued response and encouragement. Thank you, and thank you for your time.

[perseveringgolfer]

Thanks for the positive update AH- really delighted things are looking better for you and you are making progress.

[bens197]

I wanted to give an update, and to say thank yous to everyone for offering me your thoughts and your stories. I wanted to give it some time for my path to unfurl a bit, so I apologise for letting the thread run dry there. I made an appointment with my doctor, and after some discussion, we decided to send me to a therapist, as I was leaning away from medication (my sister has been heavily medicated for ~20years and I am a bit nervous about what I've seen) but we later decided, with input from my therapist that a PRN was in order. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's a pill I can take if "the big one" hits- I have it in a "just in case" capacity, and have not had to go there yet, but having it around has given me some comfort.

 

My therapist and I have focused on more of the underlying reasons for my situation- a better job, better interaction with the world, thinking about what I can do to be a better boyfriend to Ashley (she's a peach and doesn't deserve to have to have to deal with this), and positive life choices.

 

I have joined a gym- I didn't realize I needed to- I'm on my feet 8 hours a day at work, plus life- I went through a lot of physical therapy for a back injury last year and had to take almost a year off of golfing, and I noticed a marked decline in my swing speed, so I've now hooked up with a personal trainer who played college golf to help target my workouts. I definitely notice an increase in my functionality since starting at the gym.

 

I have learned alot about myself through this process- a main thing is that it's just beginning and will likely never end- but that that's o.k. I have learned that there are many potential causes for what's happened to me, including (apparently) a significant amount of head trauma, more than one abusive relationship, isolation (self-imposed, possibly because of stated abuse) and lack of ability to get over this. I have had to face these head on, and I don't want to. I have never shied away from a fight, and I don't expect to, but this is one thing I didn't prepare myself to deal with- I look forward to your continued response and encouragement. Thank you, and thank you for your time.

I'm reading words from someone who clearly has a path to make himself as well as those around him better. You sound much happier and it is so nice to see.

 

Enjoy the rest of your summer

 

 

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[palvord]

Thank you so much for starting this thread and following up with us. I am in awe of your courage to share and willingness to find solutions.

 

Mental health is as important as physical health. Keep us posted to your journey as you want to. It is clear we have a community of people who care.

 

 

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[ole gray]

I have learned alot about myself through this process- a main thing is that it's just beginning and will likely never end- but that that's o.k. I have learned that there are many potential causes for what's happened to me, including (apparently) a significant amount of head trauma, more than one abusive relationship, isolation (self-imposed, possibly because of stated abuse) and lack of ability to get over this. I have had to face these head on, and I don't want to. I have never shied away from a fight, and I don't expect to, but this is one thing I didn't prepare myself to deal with- I look forward to your continued response and encouragement. Thank you, and thank you for your time.

 

 

Awesome news!   It's hard to fix something unless you come to an understanding of what you need to fix.  Realizing you have a problem is a HUGE step in getting that sucker fixed. You're definitely on the right track and I can see a bright, successful, and happy future for you.  Kick ole anxiety square in the balls and move forward with your head held high.  Of course you'll still have occasional anxious moments, we all do however you'll have better skills on how to handle those situations.  Man I'm proud of you and keep on keeping on because it works if ya work it!  

 

***  Just saying exercise is the best freaking medicine on the planet!   

[cksurfdude]

Getting onto a fitness program is a really great step - the ancient Greeks (from whom we've derived so much of our knowledge and culture) believed that a healthy body and a healthy mind go hand-in-hand.

 

Also to throw another thought out there - though it sounds like you've got a busy schedule which is good .. but a thought to consider is to adopt a dog. I've read a lot about therapy dogs helping Vets with PTSD (and have donated to several organizations doing that work) and have taken my almost 10 year old Lab (not therapy trained) to an outdoor garden at a VA and people just love petting him .. they start to smile and look as if they're starting to relax a little bit.

(And the dog, of course, couldn't be happier)

[revkev]

Thank you so much for starting this thread and following up with us. I am in awe of your courage to share and willingness to find solutions.

 

Mental health is as important as physical health. Keep us posted to your journey as you want to. It is clear we have a community of people who care.

 

 

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I would be remiss if I didn't add spiritual health as well. People are best off when they are attending to all three of those areas. Let one slide and the others will follow.

 

 

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[gaussman1]

Hey good work man. I am very happy to hear the update and that you're taking pro-active steps.

[AH1980MN]

Thank you guys- and Rev, you're dead on there- going to service and having discussions with other folks has been a part of this, it helps keep me in perspective.

 

OG- thank you for the bust out laughter there- haven't laughed like that in a good long time! SQUARE IN THE BALLS!